


What Once Was Mine

by FortuitousOccurrence



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: Developing Relationship, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Past Lives, possible future smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-23
Updated: 2017-08-03
Packaged: 2018-01-16 16:42:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 24,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1354399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FortuitousOccurrence/pseuds/FortuitousOccurrence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A young girl of only ten years old finds herself stumbling into Middle Earth where she is adopted by Lord Elrond. As she matures into a young woman, she finds out much more about her past than she expected, especially when an old friend of her father's comes for a visit along with his son.</p><p> </p><p>[So I left this story after writing 12 chapters about 3 years ago but I recently found it again and feel kind of bad about leaving it without an ending, so I've decided to continue it. I'm still tweaking some details from previous chapters but I have a new outline and I'm ready to see this story to the end. I do take a little artistic license with this story so please don't crucify me if I alter the timeline a little or change some small details. With that in mind, constructive criticism is always welcome!]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

I do not remember much from the beginning of my life, before I came to this world. 

My mother fancied herself an intellectual. She liked to read and study all manner of subjects. I remember her trying to tell me abou the theories of  alternate universes. There could be an alternate time line with dragons or aliens or both or any number of other things, things we can't even imagine. There could be anything out there beyond our reality. My mom never really believed in those theories but I loved the idea that there were infinities of possibilities. I would read books all the time and try to imagine my alternate time line in the worlds in my books. For some reason unbeknownst to me at the time I had an unnaturally strong attraction to fantasy novels. I devoured as many books as I could read, dreaming of adventures far away. I would often dream of travelling through these worlds exploring and adventuring my way through a life that would never end.

 

Now, let me tell you how I came to where I am. I went to a friend’s house for a sleepover. I was about 10 years old and only had a few friends. This sleepover was at who I suppose was my friend’s house, Rachel, I think her name was. Well, being the mischievous children that we were, we sneaked out at night into the woods behind Rachel’s house. Rachel said that she had heard noises and strange singing coming from the woods the night before. I and a few others were nervous about being out this late at night in the woods but Rachel and the rest were laughing and daring each other to go into the woods to find the source of the strange singing. As we ventured further into the woods, our flash lights shaking with each crunch of leaves or snap of a twig, one girl, Molly I think, questioned Rachel about the singing.

 

“What makes you think we’ll find the source? I don’t even hear anything.” Molly whined. Moments after she spoke we heard a strange sound coming from deep in the woods. The sound was like music but the voice singing was odd, it was singing in a language I couldn’t understand.

 

“I told you there was strange singing,” Rachel said. “But who’s brave enough to go check it out?” No one answered. “Someone will go find it or we’re not going back to my house until sunrise.”

 

“You can’t do that. Its cold and dark and what if your parents see that we’re gone?” one younger girl said.

 

“Tough luck. What’s it gonna be? Stay out in the dark or go find out what’s making that noise?” Rachel was always like that. I can't imagine why I was friends with her to begin with.

 

I spoke up at the same time as another girl.

 

“I’ll go,” we said simultaneously.

 

“Good. You two can go together,” Rachel said. The girl and I looked at each other, took a deep breath and started walking into the woods away from the group. We stayed shoulder to shoulder the entire time, afraid to leave each others side for fear of something or anything that might hurt us or cause the other to chicken out and run. We walked for about ten minutes towards the singing until it seemed to be coming from behind a large bush. I began to push the bush out of the way and almost got past it but a hurricane force gust of wind blew me against a tree and to the ground. I could hear the other girl running away. I stood up disoriented and confused. I didn’t know where I was or which way she went so I pushed my way past the bush but I fell down again once I got past it. This time my flashlight fell and hit a rock, I couldn’t see anything. All the light I had was the moonlight that filtered through the trees. I stood up and brushed off my pajamas and straightened my shirt. The woods seemed to have changed. I couldn’t hear the other girls laughing or talking. I couldn’t hear any cars from the road that was supposed to run on the other side of the patch of woods. There was no sound except insects and rustling of leaves. It was colder and the air smelled different. I had no idea where I was and I didn’t know where I was going so it didn’t really matter which way I went. Hence I began walking in the direction the wind was blowing. I walked until my feet began to hurt and a little more. Sunlight had just began to filter through the trees when I came out of the woods to what looked like a dirt road. Maybe someone would come by and I could ask them where I was. I sat down on a patch of grass and leaned my back against a large rock. Soon I was asleep.

  
  


When I woke up I heard a thundering noise. It sounded like horse hooves on hard packed dirt. I sat up and looked in the direction of the sound. Soon enough a group of horses came galloping around the bend. Something was off though. The riders were wearing some type of robes or armor and most of them were carrying bows or swords. Was there a renaissance fair in town? I didn’t think there was. The peculiar group of what looked like all men rode closer and I jumped up and down waving my arms hoping they would stop for me. The one in the front held up a hand as they neared me and they slowed to a stop. The one at the front stood beside me. The man had long straight brown hair and wore a silver circlet about his head. He spoke to me with a smile and a gentle tone in a language that I didn’t understand, the same language as the singing.

 

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what you're saying,” I said. The man looked confused and I couldn’t help but notice some of the others, they’re ears were pointed, like elves or something. They continued to speak in a language I couldn't understand

 

"O van udúlel?" one of the men asked. "Man i theled i udúlel hi?" another asked but the one at the front held up a hand to them.

 

“Where am I?" I asked again, growing more afraid. Suddenly a flash of white light clouded my vision but in my mind symbols and sounds flooded my consciousness.

 

“Are you alright?” the man said. I was stunned by the flash. “Are you alright?” He repeated, sounding concerned.

 

“I can understand you?” I spoke to him in elvish but I don’t know how I did. The words just came to me as I spoke.

 

“I thought you said you could not speak our language ” the man commented.

 

“I can’t, I don’t know how I am.” I looked up at him.

 

“Why were you waving at my company?” he asked.

 

“I’m lost and I was hoping you could tell me where I was?”

 

“The elven kingdom of Imladris. It is known in the common tongue as Rivendell. I rule over this area. Why is it that you have made your way here?”

 

“I don’t know. I was walking in the woods with some friends and there was a gust of wind and I fell a few times then the forest was different and I walked all night until I found this road.”

 

“Do you not know where your parents are?”

 

“They’re probably at home. I live in Tennessee.”

 

“There is no place in Middle Earth named Tennessee.”

 

“Wait, did you say Middle Earth?” I asked.

 

“Yes. Is something wrong?”

 

“If this is Middle Earth… Imladris….Elves…You’re- …Oh my god.” I gasped.

 

“Yes, so you know where you are?” His concerned look returned.

 

“Oh, yes I do. This a completely different world. In my world you are a character in a book. You’re just a story.” I pinched myself repeatedly on my arm. “This has to be a dream but it isn’t, I would have woken up by now if it were.” Then the reality of my situation hit me. “I won’t ever see my parents again. My dog. My friends. They’re all gone. I have nothing.” My eyes began to water and I nearly fell down on my rock.

 

“Child, are you truly alone?” He dismounted and stepped over to me, kneeling in front of my small form atop the rock.

 

“I don’t know how I got here so how can I get back?” I sobbed quietly.

 

“I do not suppose you could under those circumstances.” He rested a hand on my shoulder.

 

“What am I going to do? I have nothing. No money, no skills, no family,” I sniffled between every other word. Lord Elrond may look strong and composed but I learned very quickly that he had a weakness for crying children.

 

“You could come back to Imladris and stay until you decide what you will do. Would that be better?” he asked squeezing my shoulder gently. I sniffled and wiped the tears from my eyes with my hand before replying.

 

“Yes, that would be better than crying in the woods,” I looked up at him and he smiled gently.

 

“It is settled then.” I was assisted in mounting Elrond’s horse and I sat in front of him on his horse. We galloped through the gates of Imladris and I was in awe of the city before me. It was so beautiful I felt the urge to cry again. Once we stopped inside the gates, Lord Elrond helped me dismount and led me inside. He stopped and told a young servant girl to find me a room and some new clothes.

 

“She will show you to your room where you may rest. I will see you again this evening.” He patted my shoulder and started to walk away.

 

“Lord Elrond,” I said. He stopped and turned to me. I ambushed him with a hug around his waist, as a child might do. “Thank you.” He seemed surprised but put a hand on my head and smiled.

 

“You are welcome. Now, go rest,” he said. I released him and allowed the servant girl to show me my room. It was large and everything was a light colored wood with pink and blue flowers. I pulled on the nightgown laid on the bed for me and crawled into the soft bed. This has been too strange. Maybe I’ll wake up when I go to sleep. I closed my eyes and soon enough sleep came but home did not.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A certain King and his son visit Rivendell.

It has been over a decade since I came to Imladris and since then my memories of my old life faded until they were nothing but echoes of dreams. They came occasionally in images or sounds when I'm not quite asleep. My name is Bellethiel now, I can't even remember my name from before.

I loved my new family but I never quite felt like I really belonged in Imladris. Elrond and his children were very kind and welcoming and now they are as much my family as my birth family. Arwen has become a dear friend of mine, one of my only friends; Melda was my only other. Melda has been my servant since I came here to Imladris.

Most of my time was spent alone. Also, because I am mortal I can never hold any real rank in my father’s kingdom, everyone here will outlive me by thousands of years. In their lives, I exist for only a few moments.

This particular day started like every other day: I got up, got dressed and went to breakfast. Adar had already eaten so I ate with Arwen, the boys went out hunting this morning. I ate quickly and headed to the Library. Grabbing a few books, I headed out to whichever spot I preferred. That day I believe I went to one of the upper level balconies. They weren't occupied at the moment and had excellent views of the city. My arms full of books, I hurried to my destination. Initially I sat on the floor with my back against the railing. By afternoon however, I was laying on my back on top of the wide railing, not even reading, just laying there, enjoying the autumn breeze as it swept my long brown hair from side to side. I had nearly dozed off when I heard hoof beats entering the city, I turned my head and watched the new arrivals. I could not see his face but at the head of the group one elf stood out apart from the others. His countenance was undeniably regal and, like many elves,  somehow both youthful.and ancient. He sat tall and proud upon a large stag. Upon his head was the lightest blond hair, the color of sunlight. I sat up too quickly, excited to see the new arrivals as they came closer, and my book fell off my lap and down to the ground below. The elf and his company rode up to the courtyard below where I sat with my legs hanging over the edge of the balcony. Father came out and greeted the man and his company. As they walked up to the entrance, the man noticed my book and looked up at me, sitting on the ledge with my disheveled hair blowing in the wind. We locked eyes and I felt a sharp pain cut through my head and a flash of something unintelligible. He picked it up and tucked it under his arm, giving me a glance as he did. My father noticed me on the balcony as well and gave me a disapproving look. I climbed down off the balcony, gathered my books, and left for the library again.

Hardly anyone spends time in the Library, father comes here occasionally but mostly me. I searched out the places where each book went and then got distracted and picked up another. I sat on the floor and read for quite a while, until I supposed the sun was just beginning to set outside. The sound of the heavy wooden doors opening stirred me from my book. I stood up and placed the book back, making a mental note to come back and finish another time. No sooner had my hand left the book on the shelf than I heard the rustle of cloth against the stone floor on the other side of the shelf. I started to walk back to the door but as soon as I noticed him, I stopped. The man with the long hair the color of sunlight. I couldn’t help but stare. He was looking at a book, the book I dropped. He had thick eyebrows and I couldn’t quite see what color his eyes were. He was very handsome and as I examined his handsomeness he looked up and watched me.

“Hello,” he said with a stern expression.

“Hello.”

“I have not seen you before.” He put the book away on the shelf in front of him.

“No, you have not,” I replied timidly.

“I'm sure you have some knowledge as to who I am,” he stated. 

“Yes, Lord Thranduil. but I really must go.” I tried to escape from his intense gaze and began heading to the doors but he spoke again.

“Wait,” his voice commanded. I bravely looked back at his gaze. His intense blue eyes spoke of great suffering but somehow seemed kind when his tone felt icy cold.“What is your name?” he asked.

“Bellethiel.” Upon answering, I hastened out of the library and ran to my room. In my haste, I nearly knocked down a blond elf carrying a bow. He seemed quite surprised from what I could tell as I hurried past him. Focused on keeping my skirts out of my way while running, I didn't even notice Arwen as I passed her.

“Slow down, Bellethiel,” she called after me. I slowed my pace to a walk as I approached and entered my room. Melda was already waiting to help me dress for dinner. She dressed me in a tastefully modest gown of dark blue-green silk.

“There’s special company tonight. One of your father’s old friends has come to visit. He’ll probably be curious about you, seeing as how you’ve only been here for a decade,” she spoke while braiding my hair.

“What do you mean curious?” I asked raising an eyebrow.

“Nothing. Only that he has never met you and is bound to have questions. And he has a very handsome son.” she said.

“Melda, are you plotting to have me married? You know I cannot marry one not of my kind.” I replied.

“No, not plotting, just talking,” she answered.

Once Melda finished I walked as quickly as I dare down to dinner. I entered the dining area and everyone was already seated. I took my seat between Arwen and my mother. The deer we ate was one that the boys killed this morning on their hunt. The meal was rather quiet, hardly anyone spoke. Father sat at one end of the table and Lord Thranduil at the other. Between Father and on the side opposite me was Elladan and Elrohir then the elf that I ran past earlier that evening. He was similar in appearance to Lord Thranduil. I felt safe in assuming that he was the visiting lord’s son. On my side of the table from Father’s end to the man’s end, there was myself and Arwen. I hardly made any eye contact that entire meal.

When the meal had ended, we all went to a terrace near to the gardens.

“I regret I could not finish the introductions sooner, my friend. This is my youngest daughter, Bellethiel,” Father said, waving me over. “Bellethiel, this is Lord Thranduil, King of Mirkwood.” I curtsied, hoping he wasn't offended by my premature departure earlier.

“It is a pleasure to meet you,” I said.

“The pleasure is mine,” he gave me knowing look, hints of a smirk on the corners of his lips. “Allow me to present my son, Legolas,” he gestured to his son, who bowed and gave me a small smile.

“Now, what shall we do?” Arwen asked, interrupting our introductions.

“Perhaps we could have a dance.” Legolas suggested.

“Yes, I believe that would be an excellent idea,” Father agreed. He called for a few musicians.

“May I?” Thranduil asked my father as he held out a hand towards me, for I was closest to him at the moment.

“Yes, of course,” Father answered. I took Thranduil's hand and music began playing. A flurry of feelings sprinted through my mind.

_ Laughing. Warmth. Summer. Wildflowers against my cheek. Hands and dancing. Smiles. _

I came back to reality as he pulled me to him. We began our dance around the floor. Legolas seemed momentarily lost when his father took my hand before he could but he quickly took Arwen by the hand and soon we were all dancing.

“So, how did a mortal girl end up in the family of Lord Elrond?” he asked rather coldly.

“He found me abandoned as a child in the forest. I had no one and he was kind enough to take me in and care for me,” I explained. His intense gaze never left me and it was making me uncomfortable.

“Elrond was always very kind. My wife was very kind like him, she couldn't stand to see a child crying.” He looked away toward the stars, remembering.

“What happened to her?” I shouldn't have asked but my curiosity spoke before I could stop it.

“She died.” His jaw as well as his grip tightened. The elven lord didn't know why he even mentioned his wife but he regretted it.

The more I thought about what he said the more flashes of images and feelings went through my mind. My head was in agony, each flash was a sharp stab into my mind. In moments, my thoughts and the flashes became too much. My hands gripped him tightly for a moment before my legs gave out and Thranduil caught me. I couldn’t keep my eyes open. The pain and the flashes of things, unintelligible things was overwhelming. I remember the smell of him as I fell, the smell of evergreens and something else, something wild. His arms tightened their grip on my body as I collapsed into the darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sindarin notes:  
> "Adar" means father  
> "Nana" means mother
> 
> The name Bellethiel means "strong one"


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellethiel has visions of the past. While on a walk in the gardens, she visits her favorite fountain but a visitor finds her there.

A man and woman. The man had brown hair and dark eyes. The woman had hair the color of autumn leaves and a bright smile beneath a nose littered with freckles. They smiled at me and held my hand. My parents. But not my parents. Parents from another time. I smiled too. I loved them.

 

A baby resting in my arms. A little boy with big blue eyes. He cooed and giggled as he played with my hair. Marveling at the child in my arms, I didn’t even notice the presence at my shoulder. Long blond hair hung down beside my face and a hand reached out to the little boy, pressing a finger into the baby’s hand, another hand was on my shoulder.

“He looks just like you,” I said.

“But he’s strong like his mother,” the man said. “Our little greenleaf.” The man knelt beside me and kissed my forehead. Lord Thranduil stared back at me with his finger still in the baby’s tight grip, a smile on his face. I smiled back.

 

My eyes snapped open, sweat soaked my body and my breathing was ragged. I touched my lips. It was a dream. I looked around my room. No one was there. But it wasn’t a dream. It was a memory. But was it me? I don’t know.

I rolled over to face the window. I could see that it was about midday and there were birds on my window sill. A smile crept on my face as I watched them. A sharp pain flashed behind my eyes and I couldn’t help but cry out with a loud yelp. Melda ran into my room.

“Bellethiel, you’re awake. What’s wrong? What hurts?” she sprinted through the questions. My head ached and my vision began to dim.

“My head...I can't...” was all I could say. I curled myself into a ball and let the relief of the darkness wash over me.

 

A red sky loomed above. In the surrounding landscape, thousands of elves men, and orcs fought. Many elves fought near me. I was on a horse and could see a far distance. A man was trying stand up but was failing horribly. I could not let him die. I raced to his aid but as I readied to dismount, I heard a shout in the distance.

“ELITHIEN!” I turned to look. The source was Thranduil. I couldn't quite see his face but I knew. He was surrounded by dead orcs and his sword as well as his armor was wet with blood and his gloriously blond hair was sullied by dirt and gore. He screamed to me repeatedly but it was too late to do anything. A column of fire and smoke hurtled toward me, covering everything in my sight. A great pain enveloped my entire being and I screamed.

“NO!” I screamed as I woke. Tears were falling down my cheeks. Father stood over my bed. Melda was on the other side.

“What is it? What's wrong?” Father asked.

“How long have I been unconscious?” I asked.

“You’ve been asleep for a day and a half,” Melda answered.

“What happened, Bellethiel?” Father inquired.

“I saw memories.”

“Memories?” Father said, waving Melda away. She left the room.

“My parents and a baby and a man and a battlefield. I don’t know. But it was real. It had to be. There was so much.”

“How do you know they weren’t just made up in your mind?”

“Adar, I know what is real and what isn’t. This was no dream. These were memories.” Father sat down on the edge of my bed and I sat up.

“What happened in these memories?” he asked.

“I remembered my real parents. What they looked like at least, my father had brown hair and dark eyes. My mother had bright reddish hair and freckles on her nose ” I paused. “Then I remember holding a baby with blond hair and blue eyes. There was a man was with me and it was our child. Then I was on a battlefield. Elves and men and orcs all fighting and I tried to help a man but I was engulfed by flames that fell from the sky.” My eyes began to water again but Father hugged me tightly.

“If it is real, it is in the past. You have a life now. You are safe, here with me and Arwen and your brothers. We are your family now.” I couldn’t tell him that I thought my past was following me.

“I should like to get up now if that’s alright.”

“I believe that is a fine idea. You have much of the day left; it is only mid morning. I’ll have Melda fetch your breakfast.” He patted my hands and left the room. I climbed out of bed and walked over to the window. The birds flew away and left me alone. The air was growing colder. I missed it, being outside. I leaned on the window sill letting my head and shoulders outside in the breeze. I looked down at the courtyard and saw Elladan, Elrohir, and Legolas messing around beneath a tree. Legolas looked up and saw me, and said something to my brothers. I looked at Legolas. Big blue eyes and blond hair. No. I dismissed the thought and waved back with a smile.

 

I went back inside as Melda came in with my breakfast. I ate quickly as usual and dressed myself in a light green dress and yellow slippers. I let my hair flow down my back in the red-brown waterfall that it was. I glanced in a mirror before I left my room. I was pretty I suppose. I looked very much like my mother, what with my reddish hair but my eyes were darkly colored like my father’s. I left my room and went down to the gardens. I needed some time outside after being cooped up inside for so long.

 

For an hour I weaved my way through the gardens until I went to my favorite place. A large square fountain with a statue of a weeping woman in the center. There was no more water in the fountain. It seems that it had been long forgotten and that’s why it was sad. Flowering vines have grown over most of the fountain. Sometimes I like to come here and sit on the edge of the fountain and think. I laid down on my back on the edge of the fountain and watched the clouds between the trees.

I had nearly fallen asleep when I heard footsteps coming closer. The owner of the footsteps stopped at the edge of the clearing.

“Forgive me. I did not know that this spot was taken.” It was Thranduil. I scrambled up off the fountain’s edge and took a step towards him as he began to walk away.

“Wait,”I said. “You can stay if you wish.” He stopped and looked at me.

“I would not want to intrude,” he said.

“You would not be intruding. I was actually hoping I could speak with you,” I continued. “You may sit beside me if you like.” He glided over and sat beside me.

“Why was it that you wanted to speak with me?” he asked.

“What was your wife like?” I looked him in the eyes. He seemed surprised and I could see him guarding himself.

“She was my wife.” He obviously did not wish to discuss it but I pressed on.

“And she was very kind but what else was she? Was she stubborn? Was she mischievous?”

“Why is it that you feel so desirous to know of my past?” he asked.

“Just curiosity. You piqued my interest the other night when you spoke of her,” I tried to save the conversation.

“She was very gentle and thoughtful...” He paused. “...and warm. She was compassionate and the bravest,” he did not look at me as he spoke.

“She sounds like a very lovely woman,” I commented.

“She was...very lovely...and rare. She was the only woman who ever captured my thoughts.” He looked back at me, capturing me with that intense blue stare again.

“What happened to her?”

“I told you. She died.” He glanced away momentarily.

“If you don't mind my asking, how did she die?” I probably shouldn't have asked such a question but I felt that I had to know. His jaw clenched and relaxed moments later he shut his eyes for a moment then reopened them and spoke.

“In the beginning of the War of the Last Alliance of Elves and Men, I lost my father and at it's close, I lost my wife.”

“What was she doing on a battlefield?”

“I think she wanted to help or at least prevent me from doing something brave and leaving our son fatherless. She was brave enough for the two of us. She was too kind for the war...” he trailed off and looked at the small light blue flowers on the edge of the fountain.

“Did she die trying to save someone else?”

“Yes. A man, of all things.” His lips twitched up briefly.

“She died engulfed in flames.” I looked down at my lap and fiddled with a flower in my hands. I didn't see him look up at me again.

“How is it that you know of that?” he asked.

“I saw it in a dream,” I admitted.

“What do you mean? What did you see?”

“In the dream, I was on battlefield with a red sky. There were elves and men fighting everywhere, fighting orcs. I saw a man struggling to get to their feet so I rushed over to help him but I heard someone call my name but it wasn't my name. It was you and you had dirt and blood all over you. You screamed my name but not my name and a pillar of fire descended on me. I screamed but I was already gone.”

He watched my every movement.

“What was the name?” he demanded.

“Elithien.” His face grew pale and he only stared at my face. I couldn't decide whether to look away or watch him so I continued to search his face for anything that might give away his thoughts.

“Do not toy with me, girl,” he whispered slowly.

“I'm not lying to you. I'm as confused as you are,” I replied.

“You have the same face,” he said. His expression softened.

“What?”

“Elithien had lighter hair but your faces are the same. I saw that when I first met you, how similar you looked.” A look of tender affection filled his eyes though the rest of his face remained his normal stoic expression.

“I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable.” I had nearly destroyed the flower in my hand from fiddling with it. Thranduil followed my gaze to the crushed flower on my palm.

“You have not so much made me uncomfortable as you have given me hope, Bellethiel.” He took the flower from my hands and dropped it on the ground by our feet. The Elvenking plucked a new, larger blossom and placed it in my hands. Our eyes met. His eyes were smiling despite his neutral expression. If he wouldn't smile I would. I couldn't help but wonder what he meant by 'given me hope.' Did he think I had a connection to Elithien? That I am Elithien? I am not Elithien. I am me, Bellethiel. What did he expect from me?

“I have a meeting soon with Lord Elrond. I would not like to be late, lest he be suspicious of my whereabouts.” I stood up as he did. “I should like to see you again soon.” A half smile graced his lips as he said goodbye. “Na lu e-govaned vin.” He turned quickly and walked purposefully out of the garden the way he came.

I plopped down on the fountain's edge where I was before. I looked back at the flower in my hands and smiled to myself. I know I had, moments ago, almost panicked a bit about how I thought he thought I was Elithien but something drew me to him, made me forget the fact that I barely knew the man and had only had three conversations with him. I quickly brushed aside the thought that he may be right, even though I knew that was one of the most plausible answers for my reaction to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1: "Na lu e-govaned vin." [Sindarin; Until we meet again.]


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellethiel escapes to her favorite place but she is followed by a curious Thranduil.  
> Thranduil has nightmares of his time in battle but luckily someone is there to comfort him for the first time in over a thousand years.

I did not see Thranduil again for a few days, except at dinner time when we would steal glances at each other when I thought father wasn't looking. Three days after my meeting with Thranduil by the fountain, Arwen pulled me aside after breakfast. I was in a hurry to a pond deep in the woods. I wanted to get out and away from everything for a few hours and maybe go swimming before the weather became too cold.

“Bellethiel, may we speak for a moment?” Arwen asked. We were standing alone in the hallway outside the dining room. I nodded. “Do you know much about Lord Thranduil?”

“I know hardly anything about him.” I lied, I knew enough.

“Have the two of you spoken?”

“Not much, we ran into each other in the library the first day he arrived and again when we danced.” It was true but not all of the truth. “Why do you ask?” My turn to ask a question.

“The two of you seem to be familiar with each other based on your behaviors during dinner these last few evenings. I only worry for your sake. He is a king and an elf who is immortal and you are human. I just don't want you to have hope where there is none. You may have been raised by Eldar but you are still mortal. Please know that I say this because I want you to be happy.” Arwen explained, holding my hands in hers.

“ Thank you, Arwen for being so considerate. I truly could not have asked for a better sister.” I hugged her and began to walk away to gather my things for my trip to the pond.

“Where are you going?” Arwen asked, calling out to me.

“The forest. Don't worry I'll stay within the gates.” I said as I slowly continued walking backwards so I could face her.

“Be safe.” I heard her say. She might have said something else too but I couldn't hear her after I turned the corner. I shoved a towel and a brush into a bag, along with a few apples for later. Slinging the bag onto my shoulder, I sneaked out of the halls and into the forest via the gardens. Not many people knew about the pond I was going to, it was a bit out of the way and barely big enough to swim around in but for just me it was my secret escape. I would come here once or twice every month for some time alone.

My little pond was an hour walk away from the gardens. There were rocks on one half of the circular pond and a grassy meadow on the other side. I had loved that pond since I was sixteen and I came wandering out here alone on a night when I was feeling particularly lonely. The moon shone through the trees and illuminated the pool of water. I fell in love with it immediately and kept coming back ever since. Today was warm, probably one of the last warm days of the year, warm enough for swimming that is. I hung my dress on a nearby tree branch where the sunlight would hit it so it would be warm once I was finished. Laying my bag beside the pond's edge on a rock, I stripped down to my and slipped into the pool of water, my undergarments clinging to me. Crisp and cool, I sucked in a deep breath and immersed myself for as long as I could hold my breath. When I came back up, I flipped my hair back and smoothed it down against my neck. I gave a deep sigh and someone chuckled. My eyes snapped open. Thranduil was slowly walking closer from the clearing's edge.

“I wondered where you were going in such a hurry.” He half smiled as he approached me. I suddenly realized just how lucky I was that I was standing where the water comes up to my shoulders. He paused when he was within ten feet of the pond. “Are you naked?” He raised an eyebrow. I looked at him then at the ground near his feet.

“Well, people don't generally come out here,” I said.

“I'm sorry. If you would like me to go, I will.”

“No, that's not necessary. You can stay if you want.” Why did I say that? This is my special place and I'm nearly naked. “I should probably get out though. Could you turn the other way so that I can get my towel?” He turned and I scrambled out and fumbled with my towel. Once it was secure, I turned around to see him facing the opposite direction but he was taking off his clothes. His bare back was already exposed and he wore nothing but his trousers. “Um, my lord, what are you doing?”

You looked so content in the pond there and the day was so warm that I thought a swim might be refreshing.” He said turning around to face me. I heard him approach the pond and decided to take a peek between my fingers. He was standing with his back facing me, luckily he kept his trousers on, and only his feet were submerged in the cool water of the pond. I don't know what came over me in that moment but I crossed the distance between us and placed a firm push against his back sending him face first into the pond. He went completely underwater and came back up seconds later. His blond hair covered his face like a curtain which he pulled apart to reveal a very displeased look. I laughed hard, nearly doubling over. The Elvenking was not amused judging by his expression.

“Bellethiel, take off the towel.” I stopped laughing and clutched at my towel.

“Why?” I asked.

“Do you want to get it wet?”

“What?” As I spoke he grabbed me and pulled me in, submerging me momentarily. I resurfaced, gasping I pulled my hair out of my face to see, Thranduil doing something unexpected. He was laughing like he was about to wet himself, an enormous grin across his face. I splashed him and began a splash war. We splashed and floated around in the pond for over an hour. We ended up leaning against some rocks on the edge of the pond. We didn't even speak, we just sat. After a while, I splashed him again and we splashed around for a few minutes more. But this time he grabbed my hand and pulled me close. Our faces were nearly touching, our breath mixing together as we breathed heavily against each other. I looked out at the trees and noticed it was nearly dusk. I pushed away from him.

“We have to go! Its nearly dusk.” I didn't even care if he saw me now I ran over to my dress and began hurriedly putting it on. He walked out of the pond and put on his clothes. Neither of us had a towel now, mine got lost somewhere along the way and he never brought one, so we both had to wring out our hair and hope we wouldn't be noticed when we got back. Once we were dressed, we began our walk back. We walked side by side, our hands occasionally brushing, in silence. Once we were close to the gardens, I stopped.

“I'll go first. You wait a few minutes and then you can go. I don't think it would be wise to be seen like this together.” I explained my plan. I started to go but he grabbed my hand. His expression looked as if he wanted to say something but he couldn't. He released my hand with a smile.

“Goodbye” was all he said.

I smiled at him before I left. I nearly ran through the gardens but walked as calmly as I could once I was inside. Walking directly to my room, I immediately began preparing for dinner. I changed and braided my hair before going down to supper.

At dinner, Thranduil was his usual stone-faced self. We exchanged glances as we ate, though he did not smile directly at me I could see the smile in his eyes, I just hoped no one else did.

“So, Thranduil, I heard you have been spending a lot of time in our gardens,” my father said.

“We do not have many gardens like yours in my kingdom,” the Elvenking replied. I wondered if Father knew or had any sort of idea about the events of that afternoon. I hope no one saw. Dinner went on with out any more scares like that. After dinner however, Legolas approached me.

“Bellethiel, would you be so kind as to show me the gardens? I heard that you spend more time there than any other member of your family.” He offered me his arm. I could feel my family's as well as Thranduil's eyes on me.

“Yes, of course.” I took his arm and we walked out towards the gardens. The sky was clear that night and the stars were bright overhead. I showed him the gazebos and a few of the fountains and waterfalls. I didn't realize until we got there that I led him to my fountain.

“This is beautiful. I can see why you like it here.” We sat on the edge of the fountain where Thranduil and I sat days ago. “To be honest, I have seen these gardens before. But I have never seen this fountain nor have I ever seen you. For a mortal, you are quite beautiful, beautiful enough to be mistook for an elf. That is something rare among mortal women.” He picked a flower from the vine and presented it to me, much like his father did.

“Thank you. I don't believe someone outside my family has ever said such a kind thing to me, I may have to believe it now.” I said smiling at the ground.

“You should believe it. You are beautiful, at least that is what I feel.” I refused to look him in the eye. This man was older than me yet he was also my son from my past life. I should change the subject but before I could, his hand laid itself on mine. My eyes flashed up to look at his. His eyes were blue like his father's and like that baby's eyes. Legolas.

“How- how old are you?” I asked.

“Nearly two thousand years. Why do you ask?” Its been nearly two thousand years since I died, I mean since Elithien died. He has never known his mother.

“No reason. Just curiosity,” I replied. Oh, Legolas. My little green leaf. Why am I thinking this? I don't know him at all. I stood up. “We should be returning soon. I've shown you the gardens and it is getting late.” He stood up and offered me his arm again and we walked out of the gardens. Legolas walked me to my room and left.

I changed into my night gown and tried to sleep but sleep would not come. My mind buzzed with thoughts of the day. My time with Legolas this evening, what I had felt. When Thranduil and I went swimming and he smiled and laughed with me. I thought about how close we had been I thought he might have kissed me but he didn't. What did I feel towards Thranduil? What did I feel towards Legolas? I didn't know, everything was a jumble of past and present and things I couldn't explain. I thought perhaps a walk would help.

Wandering about the dark halls, I stopped on one of the balconies that connected with some of the guest room balconies. I leaned on the railing with my elbows and my head in my hands. Suddenly I heard a brief shout. I looked around for the source and found myself walking along the guest room balconies looking for the room where the sound came from. I stopped by the door and opened it just a little, peeking inside.

“Hello, are you alright?” I asked. It was dark and I could hear the faint sounds of someone crying.

“Go away.” Thranduil's voice. I could hear him trying to compose himself.

“What's wrong? Are you alright?” I took a few steps into the room. He stayed silent. “My lord, what's wrong?” I walked over to where his figure sat on his bed. I sat on the bed beside him and laid a hand on his bare shoulder. I couldn't explain why I had such a strong, sudden desire to comfort him but I didn't question it at the time. “Tell me why you're upset.” He tried to steady his breathing and stop his sobs.

“I'm fine,” he said.

“No one wakes up in the night crying is ever fine. Why are you upset?” I placed my other hand on his arm.

“I dreamt of your death,” he spoke slowly, still trying to steady his breathing.

“Do you dream of this often?” I asked, without thinking.

“Yes, nearly every night. Less now that I have met you again.” One of his hands found my own.

“I can stay until you fall asleep again, if you want.” No matter how much I wanted, my hands stayed still and waited for his own to move.

“Yes,” he breathed.

“Lay down.” He laid down on his back, I laid beside him on my side. His hand held mine on his chest. I watched him as he drifted off, the rise and fall of his chest. Once I was sure, he was asleep I gently pulled my hand out of his and slipped out of the room. I went straight to my room and somehow, sleep came easier this time.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thranduil and Bellethiel discuss the future of their relationship and Bellethiel remembers a disagreement during their first courtship.

Every night after the first night I helped Thranduil, I would check on him and usually stay with him for a while, until he fell asleep again. We spent time together during the day as well. We would meet in the gardens or the library, when he had a spare moment. We never went back to my pond together though. He smiled more since that night.

One night, I came to his door and he was awake but not because of the nightmares. He sat awake on his bed wearing only his trousers, tunic and dressing gown.

“Bellethiel,” he smiled gently when I entered his room.

I returned his smile and sat beside him on the edge of the bed. The moonlight partially lit the room. “No nightmares tonight?”

“No. I haven't slept tonight. I've been thinking,” he paused to take my hand. “I've been thinking about you. I must leave the day after next and will not return for perhaps a century or more.”

“What are you saying, my lord?” I asked.

“I'm saying I need to know how you feel,” he stopped and looked at our hands.

“I care about you, my lord. I care about you very much.  Many times, I believe that I may have feelings of love for you but I don't know whether that's myself or my past. Elithien bleeds into my mind so often, yet she still feels so far away.”

“I only wish for your happiness. . . . and I want you to visit me in my home.”

“How do you expect me to do that? I've never been allowed to pass through Imladris's gates much less cross the Misty Mountains.”

“I will encourage Legolas to invite you and Arwen or your brothers to come visit. You will see my home and we will have more time together. You must come, meleth nin.” He raised a hand to my face and stroked my cheek with his thumb. 

“I suppose that would be acceptable to my father.” I smiled at him again. He pressed his lips to my forehead and wrapped his arms around me. He laid back on the bed, his hands gently guiding me to lie beside him. My hair hung down beside my face creating a curtain between us and the outside world. We didn't even do anything, and we didn't need to. We were content just seeing each other, watching the other's happiness. It was during those precious moments of bliss that I had a thought. Was this me or Elithien? Or perhaps we were the same? Now, probably wasn't the best time to think about it or to speak about it but I did.

“How similar am I to Elithien?”

“You are both very fair in beauty and spirit. She knew how to comfort me as you comforted me these past nights. Your face and even your voices are the same.” He paused. “You are both all I could ever want in a companion.” He said pushing my hair behind my ear. So I am nearly exactly like Elithien. If she was my past shouldn't I embrace her? I am me but do I love Thranduil? Do I love Thranduil? At that moment I gave up and allowed my past to blend with my present, just for a moment. Elithien loved Thranduil and I believe I do too, there is no point trying to separate who's feelings are whose. Elithien is a part of me and if that part of me loves him then so do I because no matter how much I try to fight it she is my past and that cannot be changed. This realization gave me the courage to lean down to kiss him, gently and briefly brushing my lips against his. He seemed pleasantly surprised.

“I think I love you,” I whispered to him. My smile could not have grown any larger and neither could his. He pulled me down and kissed me again. I could feel the love in his kiss, his wild adoration for me and I made sure he could feel mine. Neither of us knows how long we kissed while laying there, illuminated only by the moon and stars, until we heard footsteps outside and then a knock at the door. We sat up quickly and I nearly ran to the balcony, hiding just outside the door. Thranduil pulled his robe over his bare shoulders and chest.

“Come in.” Thranduil said regaining his stoic composure. The door opened and someone came in.

“Adar, I was awake and thinking.” It was Legolas. “I was thinking about Bellethiel. Do you suppose she doesn't like me? She was very abrupt with me the other day and I can never quite tell what she's thinking.”

“I believe she likes you. She is quite unusual.” Thranduil replied. “Now, you should go to bed, it is late and tomorrow we must prepare for our journey home.” I heard the both of them walk across the room and the door closed. I came out of my hiding place.

“Quite unusual?” I raised a eyebrow as I walked to him. He put his hands on my waist and pulled me close.

“Yes. Truly unique,” he trailed off as he laid his face against the top of my head. We stayed like that for a moment, embracing each other, but I knew that it was getting much too late.

“It's getting really late. I should go back to bed.” He held me by my arm as I started to move away.

“Stay with me. Tonight will be our last chance to lay by each other.”

“Until you fall asleep,” I said.

“Until sunrise,” he corrected me. I was apprehensive but agreed. I laid down beside him on his bed. He held me close and for once I immediately fell asleep.

 

I was at a festival, outdoors beneath the trees. Thousands of elves were out and about today. I was attending the archery contest. The contestants took their places and shot. Only two archers hit the center of their target. The two were the captain of the guard and Prince Thranduil. They each took their marks again and shot. Again and again, they shot and shot, neither missing their target until at last, the captain missed and Thranduil did not. The two shook hands and a crown of wildflowers was placed on the prince's head. I weaved my way out of the crowd and away to a nearby pond. I leaned against a tree and waited. Minutes later, familiar footsteps approached.

“You did very well today.” I said.

“I wish you would have stayed so that I could have showed every one just how lucky I am to have also won the hand of the most beautiful woman in Lindon.” Thranduil's hand grasped mine that rested against the tree. I turned to look at him.

“You know I would feel better if we discuss our engagement with your father before announcing it to the entire city.” I stepped away from him, pulling my hand from his.

“And you know, that I care not about what my father thinks.” He closed the distance between us,walking with his hands clasped behind his back, leaning forward. “I love you and I will marry you. No decision that my father can make will change that.” He stood very close to me. He took a white daisy from his crown of flowers and tucked it behind my ear, his fingers lingering on my cheek. “Because I need you as I need air to breathe and the earth needs rain to grow. Now that I know you I can never not find you, Elithien. We are inseparable, you and I. You know it to be true.”

“I know it. I love you, Thranduil. I just wish you would do things the way I want for once. Could you please do things the right and proper way, just this once, my love?”

“Alright. We'll wait and ask my father.”

“Good.”

“Oh Elithien, I love it when you get so forceful,” he leaned in and brushed his lips against my ear as he whispered, a smirk evident in his voice.

“Be quiet.” I pulled him into a kiss by the collar of his tunic.

 

With a small gasp, I woke up. Thranduil's arm lay across me and our hair mingled together. I scooted a little so that our faces were parallel. I touched his cheek and his eyes fluttered a bit.

“Good morning,” I whispered. His arm tightened around me and his lips stretched into a smile.

“Good morning,” he said. I pushed some of his hair behind his ear out of his face and let my hand rest on his cheek. Sunlight had replaced the moonlight and silence had been replaced by the sound of footsteps and voices in the hall.

“I had better go.” I started to wiggle out of his grip but he pulled me back and kissed me once more. I acquiesced until I heard a knock at his door. “I have to go.” I pushed myself out of the bed and towards the balcony. I left him in his bed and ran as quietly as I could back to my room, hoping and praying that Melda hadn't gotten there first.

I had only just touched my bed and shut the door behind me when Melda opened it again.

“Already up this morning, I see? You must not have slept well to be up this early.” She said.

“Actually I slept wonderfully.” I said pulling out a sapphire blue dress. “I think I'd like to wear this one today, Melda.” Melda helped me dress and she braided my hair the way I like it. I could feel Melda's suspicious gaze on me all morning and at breakfast Arwen noticed too. Arwen and I were the only ones in the room besides Elladan and Elrohir. Our brothers left soon after I sat down.

“What causes you to be so energetic this morning, sister?” Arwen asked.

“Nothing in particular. I slept well last night is all. How did you sleep?”

“I slept well. Lord Thranduil and Legolas are leaving tomorrow.”

“Are they? I didn't realize they were leaving already,” I remarked.

“Yes, they are. I don't suppose you'll miss them too much though.”

“How do you mean?” I stopped eating and looked at her. She glanced at me before speaking.

“Well, you treated Legolas rather coldly the other evening.”

“I took him on a stroll through the garden and nothing more. That's all he asked for, to see the garden, I showed him and that's all.” We ate the remainder of our breakfast in silence.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thranduil and Legolas leave Imladris. Bellethiel has a disagreement with her Father and makes a big decision.

Thranduil left with Legolas and his servants before dawn broke the next morning. The last we spoke to one another was when he went to my fountain the day before he left. I sat with my legs crossed, scribbling away at a sketch of a flower in my little leather bound journal. He sat down beside me before I noticed his presence.

“You are quite the artist,” he said quietly. Noticing him I put my quill and book to the side and threw my arms around him. We sat locked in an embrace on the edge of the fountain, calmly watched by the relentless gaze of the weeping woman of stone. “We'll be together again before the end of winter,” he whispered into my hair.

“How can you be so sure?” I asked.

“Believe it or not, I have been on this Earth much longer than you and sometimes, only sometimes, I know things,” he smiled.

“But I shall miss you so much between now and winter,” I leaned my face into his hair but he pulled away.

“Perhaps you could sketch a portrait of me to keep with you until next we meet.”

“That is an excellent idea.” I picked up my quill and turned to a new page in my book. So I drew his portrait as he sat for me through the fading afternoon light. Once I had nearly lost the light, I stopped and showed it to him.

“You have me utterly,” he smiled.

“We should go inside. Its nearly time for dinner.”

“Yes, I suppose we should.” I gathered my things and we both stood. One arm was full of my writing utensils and the other held my hand aloft enough to rest it on Thranduil’s. It was difficult to hide my smile as he escorted me back to the main building.

Now, I watched him and his son and the rest of their traveling party ride away. The days following their departure were quiet. Everyday I would catch myself thinking about him or flipping to my drawing of him in my book. For the most part life went on and nothing new happened. A little over a month had passed when something happened. I came downstairs one morning to breakfast and Arwen was the only one at the table.

“Where are the boys?” I asked casually.

“They're in the stables, readying the horses for their journey to Lorien,” Arwen replied.

“They're going on a trip to Lorien?” I asked again.

“Yes, why are you so-” I didn't even hear the end of her sentence because I was already leaving the room. I ran to Father's study hoping to find him. I was successful he was sitting at his desk reading a letter.

“Father?” I said announcing my presence.

“Yes? What is it Bellethiel?” he said without looking up from his papers.

“Are Elladan and Elrohir going on a journey to Lorien?” I asked, trying to catch my breath.

“Yes. They are leaving later today.”

“Could I go with them?” he looked up and rested his papers on his desktop.

“Bellethiel, we've talked about traveling through Middle Earth.”

“Yes but you always said I could travel when I was older. Well, I'm nearly twenty three in case you lost track and I think that's plenty old enough to travel with my brothers to visit your kin in Lorien. Please let me go, Father.”

“No, Bellethiel. I would rather you wait until I was going on a journey for you to travel.”

“You keep telling me to wait for the next trip but do you realize how often you travel? In my time here you have gone on one journey previous to this one and I asked if I could go but you denied me. You told me Middle Earth was dangerous, that the road was a dangerous place, no place for a young girl. I'm not a little girl anymore and in case you've forgotten, I will not live nearly as long as you or anyone here in in Imladris will.” Father stood up and stood beside his desk.

“That is why I do not wish you to go. You could die so much easier than any of us. There are dark forces in Middle Earth that you have only imagined and dangers that you have only read about. And you are so much more fragile. You are still my youngest daughter and I will protect you.”

“But-” Father cut me off.

“I said no, Bellethiel.” Tears began to well up in my eyes.

“I cannot live locked up in the mountains for the rest of my life.” Then I ran. I ran to my room and locked the door. I laid on my bed for several hours, watching my brothers mount their horses and ride away into the mountains from my window. No one came to check on me until dinner time but I would not come down. I did not want to face Father and Arwen, who undoubtedly knew about my argument with Father. I sat at my window once night had fallen and watched the sky. I wondered about the boys and Thranduil. Father would never let me visit him. I don't think my father will ever let me leave. It was then, leaning on my window sill watching the stars and the wind, that I came to a decision. If Father would not let me travel with my brothers then I shall have to travel alone. A smile visible on my face again, I dressed quickly in my simplest dress and my thickest cloak. I pulled on the only pair of boots I owned and stuffed my rucksack with my book, a quill and pot of ink, and some of my jewelry. I could sell the jewelry and use the money to pay for food and places to stay. My hood covering my head and partially concealing my face, I crept to the library stealing a map of Middle Earth, then to the kitchen where I took some Lembas and a few apples into my bag. Hardly anyone was out this late so it was easy to sneak into the stables and mount the gray mare that I was given on my eighteenth birthday. I walked her out of the stables and past the gates, where I mounted her and we began our journey at a brisk trot.

I gave one look back to my home as the sun had just began to rise. The warm pink light creeped over the mountain ridges and illuminated the only place that I have known as home. I didn't know at the time but this was the last time I would see Imladris for over a year.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been quite a while but I'm back and will continue to update at a more reasonable pace until the end of the story. Thanks a ton for following it this far and for being so patient.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We see the end of Bellethiel's journey and her return to Imladris.

_One year, four months, and seventeen days later..._

My eyes fluttered open at the sudden breeze. No one was in sight. My now dormant fire from the night before sat in a pile of ash in front of me and my pack sat by my side. I dug into a piece of bread that I had purchased in the last town I passed through, as I gathered my pack.

“Should reach home by this afternoon.” While traveling alone, I had developed the habit of speaking to myself. Not a very good habit, I'll admit, but nonetheless comforting when you're alone for days on end. The sun showed it was only mid-morning. I braided my hair as I walked. I had cut it soon after I left Imladris to reach the middle of my back. Since then it has grown past the length it was to begin with, now brushing just an inch or two beneath my hips. The day passed slowly like many of the days I've spent traveling between destinations. Today, however, I spent an awful lot of time thinking back about the past year.

I went to the Shire and saw hobbits for the first time. They were very welcoming and I ate very well while I was there. I traveled South to Rohan. They were not so welcoming. Many people thought I was odd because of my elf like mannerisms and speech. They avoided me for the most part.

Actually it was in Rohan that I had my first dangerous encounter while traveling. I had walked into a tavern and paid for a room and evening meal. It was fairly late in the evening and there were many different people there. Many of the people there, did not seem like the kind to have very wholesome or pure intentions. I sat down and awaited my meal and drink anyway. Three rather burly men sat at a table in the corner. I could feel their eyes watching me as I walked in and as I sat and tried to enjoy my rather lackluster meal, I could feel their gaze still. I dared not look at them for fear of hurrying their actions, whatever they may be. However, out of the corner of my eye I saw them stand and begin to walk towards me, grins growing on their faces, when suddenly an older man in gray clothing sat down across from me. He had a long gray beard and a staff at his side. Immediately the men went a different direction and their expressions soured. I thanked the stranger and we conversed for a brief time, until I decided to retire for the evening. He did not tell me his name.

From Rohan I went due East then followed the Great River North to Lorien. I had to explain who I was to several people before they would let me stay. The Lord and Lady were very kind to me, though I think it is only because of my connection Lord Elrond.

I left home in a dress and cloak and I return in trousers and a light tunic. I do have a dress, not the dress I started out with but one given to me while I was in Caras Galadhon. That dress is tucked away in my pack, the other has been gone for many months.

By the time I can see Rivendell, the sun is beginning to set. By the time I reach the gates, it has nearly set. The guards at the gate recognize me almost immediately and welcome me home. I nod to them with a smile on my face. As soon as I'm inside the gates, Lindir sees me.

“Bellethiel. I shall fetch Lord Elrond.” He seemed surprised as he rushed away.

I had only just stepped inside the main building where my family's bedrooms were when Father comes walking towards me with his arms open wide. He wrapped me in a hug before I could even take off my pack but I hugged him back.

“I'm sorry. I must smell terrible,” I joked.

“I've been so worried,” he said.

“I'm back and I'm safe, so you can breathe now,” I replied. He didn't get a chance to reply because Arwen came hurrying through the doorway. Father let me go and Arwen hugged me next.

“Oh sister, how I have missed you.”

“I've missed you so much,” I said.

“Where did you go?” she asked the question though I knew Father wanted to know as well.

I recounted my journey to them and they seemed impressed. I specifically mentioned the man in gray to Father, when I mentioned him his eyebrows raised and a hint of a smile came over his face.

“Do you know who the man is?” I asked, judging by the expression on his face.

“If I am not mistaken, the man you encountered was none other than Gandalf the Grey.” He answered.

“A wizard.” My eyes grew wide. I had been saved by and ate dinner with a wizard.

“Enough talk. You need rest and a bath. I shall have one drawn for you as well as some food brought to your room,” Arwen ended our conversation.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellethiel wishes to pay a visit to the Elvenking but once again runs into some disagreement with her father, Lord Elrond.

I slept very well that night. It was the best sleep I'd had in a long while. I was back in my fine dresses and slippers and my own room, more importantly my own bed. It was wonderful to be back home in the mountains, among the trees and the waterfalls and my family. But after almost a month back at home, I began to think about Thranduil even more, I missed him terribly and it had been so long. Every night while I was traveling, I would look through my little book at the portraits of my family and of Thranduil before I went to sleep. If my feelings for him had persisted until now, over a year and a half later, then they must be stronger than I had previously admitted but I wouldn't know unless I saw him again. My decision was made, I would visit Thranduil in Mirkwood whether my father would allow me or not.

Hurrying down the pathways to my Father's study, I ran into Lindir. He bowed his head to me briefly.

“Bellethiel. It's good to see you running about again,” he commented. We hadn't spoken to each other since I returned but we had never spoken much to begin with.

“It is very good to be back home again,” I replied beginning to step past him towards Father's study.

“If you're looking for your father, he is in the library.” I stopped and turned to walk in the other direction. “I could escort you there if you wish, I was headed there myself,” he offered.

“Thank you, Lindir,” I accepted and we began our walk to the library. We walked silently for a while before Lindir spoke.

“We are to have a visitor the end of this week. A ranger. He was reported to be traveling by this area soon and will likely seek rest here.”

“Oh, that sounds exciting,” I attempted to sound interested even though my thoughts were elsewhere. We walked in silence the rest of the way to the library. Father was standing by a podium with a large scroll laid out over it. Lindir left my side and I walked to Father alone.

“I see no point in mincing words Father,” I paused and he looked up at me, “I know I have only been back a month but I would like to travel to Mirkwood.” Father frowned and closed his eyes for a moment.

“Mirkwood is dangerous, I don't like the idea of you going there. If you were to travel with someone familiar with the forest, but I have not been there for many decades and the forest has changed. I cannot allow you to go.” He began to roll up the scroll he had been studying.

“Father, have I not proven that I can handle traveling by myself? I have traveled across half of Middle Earth alone and survived. I can handle myself, Father, why can you not allow me to?” I asked angrily, raising my voice. He laid the scroll on the podium, gripping the sides with either hand.

“Mirkwood is different. The forest itself is dark and dangerous, not like the forests of these mountains or anywhere you have been. It is not safe unless you have a guide that is familiar with it. And who would you be visiting, Bellethiel? What is your purpose in going to Lord Thranduil's domain?”

“Legolas invited me when he and Lord Thranduil visited last. He told me about his home and I said that I should like to visit and he invited me to visit before the Winter came that year. But events occurred that Autumn that took me elsewhere. Now that I am home and rested and able, I intend on traveling to visit him,” I lied.

“I do not doubt Legolas's kindness but it is unlikely that his father would allow a visitor into his land without notice,” Father countered.

“They would allow me. I am going Father and you cannot stop me,” I turned and left, pausing briefly to see a startled Lindir listening among the shelves. He quickly looked away from me and went back to the books as I continued to storm out of the library. To be honest, I hadn't expected the conversation to go much differently. I knew Father wouldn't let me go even though I had already proven my capability many times so far. Upon reaching my room, I began filling my leather pack with a clean dress and undergarments, my book, and writing materials. After changing into pants and a loose fitting tunic I braided my hair and set out to the kitchen in search of provisions. Lembas bread again and a few apples would serve me fine. I'm surprised no one saw me until I reached the stables. My brothers were talking while brushing their horses. I didn't notice them until it was too late.

“What are you doing wearing that Bellethiel?” Elladan asked.

“You're leaving again?” Elrohir added. The two dark haired elves approached me. I sighed and shrugged.

“There's still more to see. Which, speaking of traveling, I need a horse,” I said. “Which one would be missed the least?” I inquired.

“That would be Mor.” Elrohir led me to a tall, black horse.

“He's a little old but will get you where you need to go at a decent pace,” Elladan added, leading Mor out to stand in front of me.

“Good. I need to leave now.” The boys seemed surprised but helped me ready Mor for my journey. Before I mounted Mor, I turned to say goodbye to my brothers. “I don't know when I'll be back but please don't tell anyone I said goodbye to you before I left, they might get jealous, especially Arwen.” They laughed at the thought. “I love you. I don't think I say it enough but I'll say it now. I may not be of your blood but I love you as if I were. Thank you.” I hugged them both before mounting Mor.

“And wish me luck.” I said urging Mor into a trot out of the stable.

“Good luck, sister.” They both said nearly simultaneously.

I only had one chance to get out of Imladris alone and that was to run, run like I had an army of orcs on my tail. So I kicked Mor into a full gallop and rocketed out of the gates, hearing the guards yelling for me and calling for Lord Elrond. I was out of the mountains by sunrise the next morning and on my way to the former Greenwood the Great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mor means black in Sindarin.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellethiel gets lost in Mirkwood forest and almost killed, were it not for the Mirkwood guard. Thranduil makes a reappearance as he and Bellethiel rekindle their romance from over a year and a half ago.

Mor and I traveled quickly past the mountains and across the plain separating the Misty Mountains and Mirkwood Forest. But upon reaching the edge of the forest, my confidence in the journey faltered momentarily. The enormous mass of trees startled me. I hadn't expected it to be this ominous. And the feeling both Mor and I felt as we began to enter the forest was unprecedented. The forest itself felt powerful, and not in a good way, and corrupted. We were only a matter of feet into the forest and already it was as dark as late afternoon though I knew it was only mid morning. Mor slowed his pace and began to move backwards so I dismounted and took my things from the saddle bags into my leather pack. I led Mor back out of the trees, releasing him to go home on his own, and I turned and enter into the forest.

 

I spent several days in the forest and lost my way several times. Each time I would climb a tree and look out over the trees to find the right direction again, then continue on in that direction. I don't know how many days passed like this but it felt like many. I began hearing more at night, noises that could only be made by something very, very large. There was this spider web material that was spread across the trees and underbrush. I hadn't seen any other people or animals since entering the forest which struck me as strange but the further into the forest I went the more unnerving my loneliness became. One day, I had just gotten back to the forest floor from climbing to the treetops. It was around noon and I was nearly to my destination, the mountains where the Elvenking's palace was. 'I should arrive tomorrow.' I thought as I continued on, nibbling on some Lembas as I went. I walked for a while until I heard a cry coming from nearby. It sounded like a woman. Shoving the way-bread into my pack, I began moving quickly towards the sound. 'Perhaps I'm not alone? Or closer than I thought?' I hoped, not even thinking as to why they might have cried out. I came to a small clearing and saw something I probably should have expected given the giant spider webs. Enormous spiders, larger than horses, battled a contingent of elves. The elves were winning by the looks of it. I should have left but stood and watched from the sidelines. I should have left because moments after arriving a spider came up behind me intent on devouring me surely but a short sword flew past my head and lodged itself into the spider. I looked around and an elf with dark hair came up to me.

 

“What are you doing here, mortal?” he demanded in a harsh tone. “Run, its dangerous here,” he said before I could reply. I ran as he commanded but didn't get far as I tripped on a root and my head slammed against a tree and then a rock. Everything went black.

  
  


The next thing I was aware of was a soft bed. My eyes fluttered open and glanced around the torchlit room. I saw stone walls and an arched ceiling engraved with wildflowers and vines. A sharp pain lanced through my temple and I clenched my eyes shut again for a moment. After the pain lessened I opened my eyes again to try to get a better look at the room and noticed a distracted Legolas sitting in a nearby chair. He was looking at my book with a small smile on his face. His hair was neatly braided back away from his face and he wore a green tunic and dark colored trousers.

“You shouldn't go through people's things; it's rude,” I whispered. He immediately closed the book and smiled at me.

“I'm sorry Bellethiel. Your sketches are quite good,” he apologized, putting the book on the bedside table.

“How long was I asleep?” I asked.

“Almost four days. We were afraid you would not wake. My Father will be relieved to hear your awake as will everyone else. He showed a strange amount of concern when I carried you in. It is unlike him to show such emotion for someone not of our kind. I mean no offense but he has been acting unusually since you have came,” Legolas paused briefly, “I will have some soup brought to your room and will tell my father that you have woken.”

“Thank you, Legolas,” I said. “Could you send for some water as well? My throat is quite dry?”

“Of course,” he answered then left the room.

A maid brought a bowl of soup and helped me sit up to drink it, as well as some water. I thought that Thranduil might be so glad at my awakening that he might pay me a visit but I fell asleep before I could see him.

The next day I could sit up on my own and even stood up and walked around the room. There were no windows so there was no breeze, except when the door would open. I was wearing a thin nightgown and nothing else, so I wrapped a blanket from the bed around my shoulders. Not long after I woke, the same maid from the day before came to my room with some fruit and bread and another pitcher of water. I ate and she helped me dress in the gown I had brought with me. Having no other shoes with me, I put on my boots beneath my dress and I was led to meet Lord Thranduil around noon. He would meet me in his throne room as was customary to greet guests. I was led in by my maid and left to stand before his mighty throne.

He was sitting comfortably with a paper in his hands, he quickly folded it and placed it inside his robe. He stood upon seeing me and descended from his throne, a smile threatening his stern expression. His flowing robes trailing behind him as he went, he stopped a few feet in front of me. I smiled at him and curtsied.

“Your Majesty.”

“Bellethiel,” he replied. I could see the smile at the corner of his lips waiting to spring forth across his face. “Might we discuss your journey in my study?”

“Yes,” I nodded, following him as he left the throne room and led me over a bridge to a large room lined with books. A large desk sat in the center of the room, a bench and a few chair were scattered throughout. The doors closed behind us and we were alone. He turned to face me and I thought that his smile might destroy me from its intensity, instead I returned his smile. He stepped over to me and wrapped me up in his arms. I closed my eyes as I returned his hug, winding my arms around his slender torso beneath his outer robe, and pressed my face against his chest taking a deep breath.

“I've missed you.” I exhaled and he held me tightly.

“And I you, meleth nin.” He pressed a hand into my hair and his cheek to the top of my head. We stood there wrapped up in each other for a long while.

“Could we sit? I'm feeling a little tired.” He moved away from me enough that we could walk to the bench and sit beside each other. We sat in silence for a few moments more, I held his hand in both of mine and fidgeted a bit. 'I should explain why I haven't visited until now.' I thought.

“My lord, I-... I'm sorry I couldn't visit until now. I had a disagreement with my father and I left Imladris for a year. I wish I could have contacted you before but I had things that I wanted to do, things that I had been waiting to do my whole life and never got the chance to do. I had to do it otherwise I feared I never would get the chance--” I spoke quickly, trying to apologize but he raised his hand.

“All is forgiven. You are here now and you are safe and with me.” He put his hands over mine. “However, I would like to know why you thought you could travel through the forest alone.”

“Father wouldn't allow me to come here but I had to see you again.” 'I had to know if my feelings were as strong as I thought.' I continued silently

“He was right in not allowing you to travel here alone but despite the circumstances I am glad to see you again. You are in time for the Feast of Starlight,” he watched our hands as he spoke.

“I can come?” I asked.

“My love, it would be my honor if you would attend.” He smiled at me this time. I relished the thought of being allowed to one of his feasts, everyone knows how the wood elves love their parties and I knew father would hate my attendance at such an event. I was so happy so I leaned over and threw my arms around his neck. He held me against him and chuckled a moment. In that moment as he held me and I hugged his neck, I knew what I needed to do. I leaned away from him and looked directly into his silvery blue eyes.

 

“I had to see you and be sure. I love you, Thranduil Oropherion. I feel it in every bone in my body and every drop of my blood, I have loved your for many years,” I declared to him. He pulled my face to his and kissed me, soft and passionate but brief. We separated and I stared at him, momentarily shocked. “You should kiss me like that more often,” I said.

“I intend to,” he smirked. A knock on the door caused us to shove each other away until we were a proper distance from each other on the bench. “Enter,” Thranduil answered. An elf entered.

“My Lord, the kitchen would like to know which wine you would like to be served at the feast? And the captain of the guard wishes to report on their latest expedition,” the elf informed him.

“Thank you, Galion. I will send the list of wines to the kitchen as soon as possible and will see the Captain in the throne room immediately,” Thranduil commanded Galion. Galion bowed and left, closing the doors behind him. He took my hand again and we both stood. “I must go. I will appoint someone to take you to your new room. It is unlikely that we will have any time to speak until the feast. I've arranged some clothing for you, it should be ready for fitting shortly.”

“You didn't have to do that,” I started to say but he pressed his palm against my cheek.

“You are my guest now and my dearest guest will receive only the finest in the realm.” He kissed my forehead one last time before we exited his study and separated, he to meet with the captain of the guard and I to my room. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellethiel gets settled in the Elvenking's palace.

Thranduil asked Galion to show me to my new room. Galion was an inch or two shorter than his king and with dark brown hair. His face looked kind and also as though he had seen many tragedies.

“How long have you served Lord Thranduil, Galion?” I asked as we walked. He seemed pleasantly surprised at my interest in him.

“I have served his Majesty since he took the throne over two thousand years ago, but I have known him since he was an elfling,” he gave me a smile.

“Wow... I suppose it is just difficult for me to grasp such an amount of time.”

“It is a long time for anyone.” We walked up some stairs and into a hallway. Galion led me into one of the rooms closest to the hallway entrance. It was larger than the other room and much more lavish. The large double bed was much larger than my old bed at home. The posts of the bed were carved with all sorts of flowers. There was a small sitting area directly inside and a vanity against one wall. The bed was around a corner to the right and around a corner to the left was a curtained off area that held a large bathtub, also exquisitely carved. Everything was upholstered in lavender except the bed which was covered in blankets of cream and periwinkle, sheer lavender curtains draped around the large bed. All the wood and stone in the room was very light as well.

“This is beautiful,” I said slowly stepping through the room. Galion stopped just inside the door.

“It is. The king had it redecorated when he last returned from Imladris,” Galion explained.

'He did this for me,' I realized. “What was this room before it was redecorated?”

“Well, before the Queen married Lord Thranduil, she was given this room until their wedding. Once they were married, she moved to his quarters. And after her tragic death this room was left empty for centuries until the other year when his Majesty ordered it to be cleaned.” It was his wife's room, he gave me his wife's old room. My old room. I stood by the bed and ran a hand up and down one of the posts, over the flowers. A warm feeling filled me and I felt tears pricking at my eyes. I blinked them away and looked to Galion again.

“Thank you, Galion. This room is lovely.” He bowed.

“You're very welcome, my lady. The dresses his Majesty ordered for you will be brought here for fitting later this afternoon,” he informed me quickly and left the room. I sat down on the bed for a moment then went to the vanity, opening the drawers on either side. Inside one drawer were brushes and combs and various hairpieces but in the other was a collection of necklaces and other pieces of jewelry, all fit for a queen. I took a deep breath and closed the drawer. This was too much. If anyone found out about us. . . Valar knows what would happen. We can't let anyone know. Elves only marry once in their lives because their relationships continue in the afterlife and if one were to marry a second time, it would be unforgivable and if it were a King to marry a second wife... It scared me that I might cause difficulty for Thranduil because of our love. I thought on this for quite a while, my mind running away with the possibilities of what could happen to either of us. While I sat thinking time managed to get away from me and before I knew it the seamstresses were here to fit my new dresses. The dark haired women hurried in and about pulling me behind the curtain to change into the dresses.

They worked very quickly and were quite friendly though I couldn't understand much of what they were saying. They mostly spoke Silvan but knew a few phrases in Sindarin, which I spoke. The head seamstress spoke Sindarin fairly well and was quite funny. Despite the language barrier they were all very friendly and after two hours I had been fitted for five new dresses. One of them, a forest green and silver gown, was the dress that I would wear to the Feast of Starlight. The ladies left as quickly as they had came and I was left alone once again. Not long after they left I began to feel a bit tired and achy so I laid down on the bed for a short while and soon I was asleep.

I woke to someone gently shaking my shoulder. It was the maid from before. 'I must learn her name,' I thought.

“I was sent to fetch you for dinner, my lady,” she informed me. I sat up and my head ached horribly.

“I don't believe I'll be making it to dinner, my head aches horribly. Could you send my apologies to his Majesty and the prince? And perhaps fetch me something for my pain?” I asked her. She looked no older than me but that probably meant she was hundreds of years old. She nodded and left. She soon came back with a note and some tea. I read the note first.

' 'My dearest, I am sorry you are still unwell. You are in my thoughts always. Please enjoy this tea, it has always soothed my aches and pains. Yours always, Thranduil.' How sweet.' I thought. 'But what if the maid read it'

“Did you, um, read this?” I asked innocently.

“No, my lady,” she replied quickly. I took a sip of the tea. It was still very hot but it was sweet.

“What is your name?” I asked her between sips.

“Maerwen,” she flashed me a smile.

“And will you be my maid while I'm here?” I inquired.

“Yes, my lady, do you object?” She asked worriedly.

“No, you're very nice Maerwen. Thank you.” Maerwen smiled again.

“You're welcome, my lady. Will you be needing anything else for the time being?”

“No...But I would like to know your opinion on something,” she nodded and stepped closer to the bed where I sat. “What is your opinion on the King?” She seemed surprised at my sudden question.

“He is a fine ruler,” she replied shortly.

“Yes, but how would you describe his disposition? His personality? Just from your perspective,” I insisted.

“He is...” she paused, “He always seems very stern and sometimes angry but he is very patient and wise. He has reigned over our people for thousands of years now and it is difficult, at least for me, to see us without him,” she explained slowly. A smile grew on her face as I appeared pleased with her answer.

“Thank you, Maerwen.” I said. 'It might be best to stop with the questions now, I don't know her that well, after all.'

“You'll want to drink that down quickly, it will make you very sleepy.” She gestured to the tea. “If that is all, I will be back to pick up your cup within the hour.” She curtsied and left. She was right about the tea, I was already beginning to get sleepy. I finished off the cup, setting it on the bedside table then settled back into the bed, letting the tea do its work.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellethiel attends the Feast of Starlight and parties it up with the wood elves.

If it weren't for the bustle outside in the halls of the palace, I might have slept longer but it was already past noon. I groaned as I stretched myself out along the length of my bed and sat up just as Maerwen walked in carrying a bucket.

“You're awake. Good. You need to prepare for the feast.” She went beyond the curtain and I heard water splash into the tub. Three more maids came in and dumped hot water into the tub, all leaving as quickly as they came, the last shut the door behind her. I climbed out of the bed and went over behind the curtain. Maerwen helped me undress and slide into the hot water. All my pains from the day before had gone and the hot water only made me feel better. Maerwen tried to help me bathe but I assured her I could handle this on my own so she waited for me. After my bath, Maerwen dried my hair and braided it around my crown, weaving in yellow wildflowers as she went, the last flowers of the season. When she finished, I looked to have a crown of flowers atop my head. I smiled in amusement as I inspected my reflection in a mirror.

“It's wonderful, Maerwen. Thank you.” She smiled in reply.

“Now, for your dress.” She said. Maerwen went to the wardrobe against the far wall and pulled out the deep blue and silver gown that I was fitted for the evening before. It took a while for Maerwen to lace me into it and when she finished she pulled me over to stand in front of the mirror on the vanity. The cool blue hues of the dress complimented my dark hair. But my hair was pulled back from the sides of my face, unfortunately highlighting my very human ears. I twirled and watched the full skirts flow around me. I never had a reason to wear such fine dresses at home but now, oh how wonderful it felt. “And finally...” Maerwen began. She went into one of the drawers of the vanity and pulled out a silver necklace. “The king requested you wear this. It's a gift.” The necklace was a vine of silver with small leaves and in the center was an amber colored gemstone, bright and clear. Maerwen placed it around my neck and took a few steps away from me.

“Wait, until they see you. A mortal whose beauty can match that of the elves.” Maerwen mused with a dreamy look on her face.

“Thank you, Maerwen.” We laughed and a knock sounded on the door. Maerwen ran over to answer it as I watched from where I stood. Legolas stood outside and he looked past Maerwen at me.

“Bellethiel...That dress suits you well.” He took a step inside.

“Thank you,” I thanked him. He wore all silver and green with a circlet of silver about his head.

“That is very kind of you. I wished to escort you to the feast, if you would permit me?” he held out his hand. Part of me knew that Thranduil would not be able to escort me himself but I was still a little sad that I wasn't on his arm instead. Nevertheless, Legolas was kind and handsome and wished to escort me himself.

“Of course.” I laid my hand in his and he led me out of the room. I smiled to Maerwen before she was out of sight and she smiled back.

As we walked, he would glance at me then look away thinking I didn't notice how he smiled at me. It's very nice being admired but I can't help but worry about him should he find out about his father and I..

We had to walk a long way and up many flights of stairs to reach the feast. The sun was setting, revealing the first stars of the evening and many elves were already out and dancing. Legolas pulled me over to dance and hardly anyone even noticed that I was the only human there as we danced through the crowd of elves, at least I didn't notice if they noticed. We danced for a while but luckily Legolas noticed when I began to get tired so he led me to the head table where I would be dining with he and Thranduil. Thranduil was already seated and had a glass of wine in his hand. He smiled when he saw his son and I emerge from the crowd.

“I trust you haven't tired yourselves out already,” Thranduil said in greeting as we sat down.

“I certainly have not,” Legolas replied, taking a glass of wine for himself.

“I think I need to sit down for a bit, I just can't keep up with everyone else.” I took a deep breath. “You can go on, Legolas, I'll be fine sitting here if you want to go dance more.” Legolas downed his wine and placed a hand gently on my arm with a smile then left to dance again. “I just can't keep up with him,” I said quietly, turning to look at Thranduil. We sat on the same side of a long table, a single seat between us.

“Neither can I,” he smiled a little.

“That's because you're his father. You're far older than him but me, I'm only 25, I should be able to keep up,” I replied with a laugh, looking out at the dancing crowd of elves. They were all so graceful and energetic, I wished I could be that beautiful.

“You are only a mortal woman, you are not expected to keep up with an elf, especially one as energetic as Legolas,” Thranduil said watching his son in the crowd. I couldn't help but feel a little hurt at his reminder that I am still only a human allowed to live among elves and it would always be that way. I know he intended no offense but it is still a fact that I do not enjoy being reminded of. I believe Thranduil saw the worry on my face after his last comment because he laid his open hand on the seat between us and gave me a reassuring smile. I laid my hand in his and returned his smile then looked back out to see Legolas dancing with a red haired woman. Her clothes were very plain but she and the prince seemed to be familiar with each other. They were laughing together. It made me smile to see him happy. Thranduil and I ate and watched everyone as the night went on but his comment from before continued to pop up in my thoughts. I am only a human that they have allowed here. If they found out that their king and I cared for each other, I don't know what would happen to me but I can guess what will happen to Thranduil. I would be detested because of my race and relationship. I grew more and more worried and more and more determined not to allow Thranduil to see my worry.

After a while Thranduil had to speak to someone about something and I was left alone so with my new determination to blend in as well as possible, as well as my thirst as I had not drank anything all evening, I took up a glass of wine. I had never drank much and much to my surprise Dorwinion wine was much stronger than I expected but I continued on anyway. Soon I finished a glass and began to sip at another and everything began to feel a bit fuzzy after that. I'm not sure I remember everything. 


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellethiel gets plastered and spills the beans. Legolas and Thranduil have a talk.

Bellethiel was quite drunk by the time Legolas came to check on her. She was swaying in her seat and not making much sense.

“You need to retire for the evening,” Legolas told her.

“No. No, I'm fine. I can stay. I'm fine,” she refused, putting a hand on his arm.

“No, you're not. Can you walk or am I to carry you?” He held out a hand to help her up.

“I can walk perfectly fine.” She stood up steadying herself by his hand. They began to walk but she didn't make it past the stairs. They reached the stone staircase leading down from the mountaintop back into the palace and she fell onto him. Legolas picked her up and carried her in his arms down the stairs. The further down they walked, the less people there were about and the more she began to cry. It was several minutes before Legolas noticed her silent tears.

“What is wrong, Bellethiel? Why do you cry?” he asked softly. She sniffled a few times before replying.

“It'll always be like this. I'll always be the one being taken care of. That's how it's always been because I'm just the little human that's allowed to stay here. People will talk about me. They'll hate me,” she sobbed some more, wiping her nose on the long billowing sleeves of her gown. They reached the hall where her room was.

“Why would anyone ever hate you? You are as kind and as beautiful as any elleth or woman that I have met,” he replied struggling to open her door with one hand. He stepped into her room and set her down on the bed in a sitting position.

“I am no elf,” she said plainly. “That is why I will be hated.” Legolas knelt beside her bed to look at her.

“No one will hate you because of your race,” he felt so saddened by her tears that for a moment he thought he might cry himself.

“They will...when they...find out...” she sniffled between words.

“When they find out what?” His brows furrowed in confusion at her near confession.

“About me and Thranduil. . . It feels so good to say that aloud. Me and Thranduil,” she stared off dreamily and laid down on her side on the bed. Legolas sat frozen in place. His father and Bellethiel? Was it true or was it the product of her drunkenness? He would have to speak to his father to find the answer because Bellethiel had already fallen asleep. He stood and left.

Legolas waited until the early hours of the morning when he knew his father would be coming back to his rooms. He greeted Thranduil outside the door to his chambers.

“Father, could we speak in private?” Legolas requested.

“Of course,” the King agreed and they went inside the privacy of his bedchambers. “When did you last see Bellethiel? I haven't seen her for some time.”

“She had too much wine so I took her to her room several hours ago. Father, she is actually what I wished to speak to you about. As I escorted her to her quarters, she spoke to me quite frankly about some of her feelings.” Legolas began as his father walked to a nearby table and poured himself yet another glass of wine.

“Really? Her feelings on what?” If the Elvenking suspected Bellethiel of telling their secret he did not show it.

“She was afraid that she would be hated because of her race.” The prince paused, “She said that people would hate her because of her relationship with you. What does she mean by that?” He approached his father slowly. Thranduil sighed, he had hoped that he would be able to choose when to tell Legolas but there was no point anymore.

“I love her. I have loved her for thousands of years,” Thranduil saw no point in dancing around the fact so he said it very plainly.

“How? She is only a mortal woman.” Legolas was only more confused now.

“She is so like your mother that it is strange that I believe them to be the same. She has had visions from your mother's life that only your mother and I knew about. She could not have known unless she experienced them herself. She experienced the death of your mother. She felt the flames destroy her as I watched on helplessly. There is no other explanation for this phenomenon except that she has your mother's spirit in her,” Thranduil pleaded his son to understand but Legolas sat quiet for several long minutes.

“What memories?” he asked finally.

“The day of your birth, holding you in her arms. She remembered when we decided to tell my father of our wish to be married.” Thranduil smiled nostalgically as he looked down for a moment. Legolas did not speak again for a whole minute.

“I see that you care for her. If she knows all the things you say that she does then, it is unsurprising that I adore her as well, ” Legolas replied. Thranduil could not help but smile at the kindness of his son. He knew it was a trait inherited from his mother; her kindness and bravery had always been apparent in their son.

“If you feel that way then, how would you feel if I were wed to her?” the Elvenking added hesitantly. His son stayed quiet a moment, not answering.

“Do you intend on marrying her?” the prince inquired.

“I do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that before I apologized and said I wouldn't be finishing this story but as luck would have it for those of you who enjoyed this series, I've taken this story up again and am working on re-editing and continuing this story. If all goes well, a new chapter will be coming about soon.  
> [edit: 6 July 2017]


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thranduil is caught between his son and the woman who possesses the spirit of his wife.

“I see that you care for her. If she knows all the things you say that she does then, it is unsurprising that I adore her as well, ” Legolas replied. Thranduil could not help but smile at the kindness of his son. He knew it was a trait inherited from his mother; her kindness and bravery had always been apparent in their son.

“If you feel that way then, how would you feel if I were wed to her?” the Elvenking added hesitantly. His son stayed quiet a moment, not answering.

“Do you intend on marrying her?” the prince inquired.

“I do.”

“What of my mother?” Legolas spoke out, anger growing in his voice with every word. “Does she not wait for us on the shores of Valinor?” Thranduil remained silent as he listened to his son’s sudden outburst of emotion. “How can this mortal woman possess the spirit of my mother?”

“It is just as perplexing to me, how she can know so much,” Thranduil answered, his face lowered in front of his son. “I have never seen it occur in my lifetime, an elf return to this land after dying in the form of another race. There have only been a few who returned at all, and always the same as the way they were before their deaths. It puzzles me how she came back to me in that mortal body.” The Elvenking stayed quiet for several moments, staring off as he felt the gold ring on his finger, his marriage ring.

“How can you be entirely sure that she is my mother?” Legolas interrupted his father’s thoughts.

“I can feel her close to me. I can feel her presence when Bellethiel is near,” Thranduil paused, emotion threatening his voice.

“Because your bond with her persists,” his son offered. The King tightened his jaw and answered.

“Yes.”

“Is the bond truly that strong?”

“Until you have pledged yourself to someone, you cannot know the true strength of it,” Thranduil turned away from his son, looking down at the gold ring on his hand.

“If she possesses the spirit of my mother, is there a need to marry again? Is she not still your wife?” Legolas asked.

“This is a new life for her. If we are to be husband and wife again, we must be wed again.”

“How can she live as your wife when her life will pass in but a moment of yours?” Legolas’s tone returned to anger. “She will grow old and die again and once again, you will be alone.” Legolas’s father turned to face him quickly, a hard expression on his face.

“I would take a few moments with her than live the rest of this life alone,” Thranduil spoke harshly and quickly, staring down at his son’s disapproving face. Thranduil stood there glaring at his son before Legolas finally averted his gaze from his father’s eyes. Legolas was at a loss for words, afraid that anything he could say would only serve to hurt his father more. He turned and left without speaking.

Thranduil sighed and taking a few deep breaths as he sat down, letting his outer robe fall off of his shoulders. Closing his eyes, he let his head rest against the high back of the chair. In his mind, he saw the first time he and his dear wife met.

  
  


_ Many years ago, when Thranduil was still a young prince not yet past the age of 48 years old, he went out with a hunting party made up mostly of other young elves his age with the exception of one young elleth who was eager to keep up with them. A daughter of noble birth like Elithien would rarely participate in activities like hunting but she enjoyed it. She enjoyed being out in the forest among the trees and animals and she enjoyed the thrill of the hunt. _

_ A wild boar had caught the small party’s attention, drawing them further into the woods. The group fanned out across the forest floor and Elithien found herself close to the young prince. In his search for the boar, he found her trying to balance herself on the back of a boulder in order to hide behind the stone and achieve a clear shot at the boar. She shot and hit it in the middle of it’s side, stirring the large animal. It stood and began to charge her. She loosed several more arrows but as she did, several others lodge themselves into the creature alongside her own. The animal went down and she climbed over the boulder to approach the animal. On the opposite side of the beast, Thranduil approached, his knife unsheathed and ready to end the animal’s life if it hadn’t ended already. The two elves mirrored each other on either side of the beast. _

_ “I believe it was my kill,” she spoke first, clear and bright. He remembered the determination in her eyes when she said ‘my kill.’ _

_ “My arrow was the one that brought it down,” he contested. _

_ “It was not. I tracked the animal to this location and shot first and last,” she argued, taking a step closer to the animal between them. “I took it down.” Thranduil was trying to decide whether to insist that it was his kill or let the girl take it, but others from their hunting party rejoined them. They saw Thranduil’s knife out and at the ready and assumed, much to Elithien’s annoyance. As the others approached them, praising Prince Thranduil’s skills, Thranduil looked across to Elithien giving her a smirk. At the time Elithien pursed her lips and walked away, but that encounter had planted a seed in the both of them that would bring them together again. _

 

Bellethiel woke before the sun was up or the lanterns were lit. Her head and body aching, she wandered the halls, hoping to run into Maerwen or Galion or someone she knew. The halls of Thranduil were large and maze-like compared to her home in Rivendell, especially in her drowsy and only slightly inebriated state. On another pathway, just out of earshot, she saw Legolas hurrying away. When she reached the path, she looked both at where Legolas had come from and where he went and made a choice.

She knocked on the only door on the pathway from which he left, her knuckles gently tapping the massive wood doors. No one answered her but being curious as she was, she knocked again and listened. She thought she heard someone say “come in” so she softly, pushed the door open. Poking her head inside before her entire body, she looked for the source of the voice, or perhaps the cause of Legolas’s hurried pace.

“What is it Galion?” the king’s voice carried through the chamber. “I wish to be alone.”

“I’m sorry,” Bellethiel answered quietly, still lingering half inside the doors. Thranduil turned to look at her and relaxed.

“Meleth nin, come in,” he stood from his chair and met her as she followed his instruction, the door gliding shut with a barely audible thud. Holding out a hand for her, he smiled at her, the frustration of his previous conversation already faded. “How are you feeling? Legolas told me you went to bed.”

“I drank far too much and I ache horribly now. I woke up and tried to find Maerwen or some water when I saw Legolas hurrying from this room. I should have known your chambers were here,” she said, looking about the room. Quiet memories came back to her in pieces, sleeping in this room, talking and arguing late into the night, and drunken laughing fits side by side when they were younger. Thranduil could see in her face what she was remembering. Their bedroom had remained unchanged through the millennia she was gone. He was unsure of whether he felt eager or nervous when her eyes fell on the bed. The frame of it was simple but it’s furnishings were elegant and regal. It was where they were first wed and where their son was born. The memories of that time fluttered through her mind, vague and distant. She looked back at him, a weak smile trying to come upon her face.

“I can call for Galion or for medicine, should you need it,” he offered, both of his hands closing over the one she gave to him before.

“I believe I feel better for simply being near you,” she replied.

“Then,” he began, wrapping his arms around her, “I shall stay close to you until you are well.” She smiled as she relaxed against him.

“Another memory came to me while I slept this evening,” she said, sliding her arms around his waist.

“What memory?”

“At our last great feast in Lindon before the migration to the East,” she began. “You had seen me out hunting several times but you hadn’t seen me dressed up before.”

“You shone brighter than any other that night,” he commented. He found himself stroking her hair, pulling it away from her face, his fingers running through it as she recounted her memory of that night so many centuries ago.

  
  


_ The great boar was only the beginning of the tension between them. A number of other wild game brought them to keeping score of the other’s kills. But this night, they did not know that it would be the last great feast before their emigration West and Elithien did not know that she would eventually join Thranduil on that journey. Thranduil did not notice her at first but once the dancing began, he saw her. She was shying away from a friend of his who wanted to dance with her. Minutes later, he found her watching him from behind her drink. It was not the first time she had seen him dressed up with a shining tunic and leaves woven into the circlet he wore. _

_ Thranduil made his advances slowly until she did not realize he was standing near her. They had been watching each other for an hour by the time they were beside each other. Intent to not allow Thranduil the upper hand, Elithien spoke first. _

_ “And what number glass is that in your hand?” she asked, eyeing his goblet of wine. _

_ “What does it matter?” he countered, mirroring the smirk on her face. _

_ “At this pace, I will still be dancing when you fall into a drunken stupor,” she commented, sipping from her own glass. _

_ “How can you continue dancing when you haven’t danced at all tonight?” _

_ “The night is still young,” she looked away from him. _

_ “If you have not yet, then when will you?” he continued. He didn’t expect her to turn to him so quickly. She set her glass on the nearby table and bowed to him, holding out a hand. Smirking up at him, she invited him to dance with her. He hesitated. _

_ “I believe you owe me,” she reminded him, “for the boar.” Acquiescing, he took her hand in his. _

_ “Don’t try to lead,” he told her. He knew she would. _

_ “You don’t command me, Thranduil Oropherion,” she replied as they took to the dance floor, hand in hand. They couldn’t help but watch each other all night. Thranduil’s wine soon became as weak as water in comparison to watching her dance and smile back at him. Anyone could tell, even Elithien and Thranduil, their period of courtship would be brief. _

 

“My hair was near to the color of yours then, perhaps slightly darker,” she thought aloud. “We were married less than eight years after that night.”

Thranduil thought about when and how he might bring up the topic of marriage but Legolas’s distrust lingered in his mind. How could he gain anymore proof than he already had? Thranduil did not know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! I know I haven't updated this story in almost three years but my intense adoration for Tolkien's works and the character of Thranduil came back quite unexpectedly. Since it has been so long, I lost all my previous planning for this series and had to re-outline everything. I have found music and artwork and inspiration and resources on Elven cultures and histories, SO I'm ready to see this to the end this time. The previous chapters will still likely be undergoing some editing (including the changing of Thranduil's wife's name, Milluiel is now Elithien, it means moonlight I think and it fits much better to me) so the whole story may turn out slightly different, hopefully a little more refined, than how it originally was. Thank you for your comments and kudos and subscriptions and most importantly your patience. Please check back in soon for new chapters.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellethiel tries to find out how she came back as a mortal woman. Thranduil proposes that they marry again but an argument ensues and Bellethiel receives more visions of her past.

I grew restless in his halls after the night of the feast. I was bothered by the thought of someone learning of our relationship. Thranduil might not have a problem hiding me away and keeping me for himself but that was never a life that I would want, in this life or the past. If it meant being restored to my previous position as his wife and queen, I might be willing to stay but if I am mortal, there is no possibility of that. If I cannot live freely by his side, then I cannot stay in those caverns underneath that sick and darkening forest.

Shortly after the feast, the snow came and sealed me into the halls of Mirkwood. If I chose to leave, I would not be able to make it home until spring came and thawed Misty Mountains. With the winter securing me in Thranduil’s home, I had no choice but to make myself busy there. I took walks with Maerwen and worked on embroidering a small purse as a gift for Arwen when I returned. In my other spare time, I searched through the books that Thranduil had on histories of our kind, his kind, the Eldar. I searched for the individuals who I knew had been re-embodied. Glorfindel returned from death shortly before I died but he remained an elf. The story of Beren and Lúthien provided a small amount of insight to my questions but still revealed little to me of how I personally came to be in this situation. My question of how I came to be mortal was still unanswered after weeks of searching and there was no answer or hints of an answer in sight.

 

A month after the feast was when something changed between Thranduil and I.

We ate dinner together, often without Legolas, since I arrived in his halls. We frequently ate in the privacy of his chambers, with only two servants attending us. But this particular night, when we were nearly finished with our meal, he dismissed them. I gave him a suspicious look and lowered my fork.

“I hear you’ve been looking for the story of Beren and Lúthien,” he said.

“Yes. I’ve read it several times but I’ve mostly been searching for what became of them because I know Lúthien was re-embodied like me, as a mortal,” I replied, setting my silverware back on the table.

“They say she sang a song so beautiful and powerful that it moved the heart of Mandos himself and he gifted her with a mortal life,” he answered. “She lived out her mortal life with Beren until their deaths in the First Age.”

“It makes me wonder how I could have been reborn into this body when I have never accomplished any great feat or had any epic love story like Glorfindel or Lúthien. I lived an honorable life but I cannot fathom how I came to be the way that I am.” I looked down at the table while I spoke. I felt confused and frustrated.

“It is a puzzlement to me as well. But what would change if we knew how you came to return to me?” he asked, standing up and holding a hand out to me.

“I don’t know. Perhaps nothing,” I answered, standing and placing my hand in his.

“Even if we do not understand how you returned the way that you have, should we not savor the time we do have together?” He held my hand against his chest in both of his own. I smiled at him without speaking but I knew he could see my agreement. “Meleth nin, perhaps we should be wed again?” he proposed in a soft voice. My eyes widened for a brief moment before I averted my eyes, looking down at the table beside where we stood. Mincing words was never one of his strengths.

“Really?” I said finally. So many different responses came to my mind in the seconds that passed before my reply, but I did not know which I felt more strongly.

“If we are to resume our relationship, if we are to consummate our love again, we must be married again,” he watched my face closely as he explained his reasoning. “We might not have to go through the ceremony again if you were simply re-embodied in your previous body but under the circumstances, it feels necessary.”

“What would change? What would my life be like if I was your wife but unable to be your queen?” I could see a small crack in his expression begin to form, a miniscule crack of frustration and disappointment. “I know those on your council. I know those high ranking members of this kingdom and they will not have me here. As a guest, I can stay but if you tell them, there will be consequences for both of us.” I stepped closer to him and looked to his eyes, a sense of despair growing in them because he knew my words to be true. “I cannot marry you if I cannot live as your equal.” I pressed my free hand ever so briefly to his cheek before removing both of my hands from him. His hands fell slowly to his sides as he watched me take a step back.

“The nobles can be swayed. Many seasons have passed since we ruled side by side. Things have changed,” he countered, taking a step towards me as his tone grew more firm.

“I know how they felt about me and they would not want me back,” I argued, drawing from small memories that had resurfaced since my return to the former Greenwood.

“Two thousand years have passed, meleth nin.”

“Yes, but you weren’t here during the war,” I responded without thinking. I honestly was not even sure of where my words originated. “You weren’t here when the news of your father’s death came, and I was alone to keep this kingdom from falling into ruin while you rode into battle in the south, unknowing of whether you would even return to me or if you would meet the same end as your father.” Tears began welling up in my eyes, though not spilling over, even as my throat began to close up. “And when the assault on Barad-dûr began and you left me again to ride into battle in Mordor, it nearly drove me mad with worry. They thought me to be a blind fool when I left to join you. They made it very clear to me that they thought me unfit to be the wife of the new King of the Great Greenwood,” I paused to take a breath. It had been millennia since he had heard me raise my voice to him and he was now unaccustomed to it. “I know that they would not take me back as their queen, especially when they know I will not live to the end of the century.” My lower jaw threatened to shake but I clenched my jaw as well as my fists at my sides.

“Meleth nin,” he said quietly, trying to comfort me. I looked down and away from him and I felt his emotions shift in the air between us. “I am not the same prince that I was.” I didn’t need to look up to see his hard gaze on me, I could feel it boring into me with every word. “Your death and the death of my father hardened me. The events of the war caused me to grow as cold as the stone that surrounds us now. I commanded this kingdom for nearly two thousand years. Alone.” He paused to close the space between us and put a hand on my shoulder. “They will accept the judgement of their king,” he declared to me, calm and imposing. His hand slid behind my neck, his large hand resting there beneath my hair. I looked up at him, my expression as rigid as his own, as hard as the tone of his voice. Until that moment, I had not been able to see what he had become, how he had changed. He was a hardened, compelling and imposing incarnation of the brave, mischievous prince that I had been remembering until that moment. He had changed but I knew it was in his character from long ago, he would do anything to keep those he loved close by.

There was something else bothering me though, and I hadn’t put it into words until that night.

“I do not doubt your will, meleth,” I breathed. Leaning my head forward to lean against his chest, I closed my eyes. “But this path is a dangerous one,” I added as his other arm came around me.

“I know, better than you think.” His hand on my neck slipped away from my skin to smooth my hair down my neck and back. With my eyes closed and my hands gently resting on his chest in front of me, I tried to ignore the images that came flashing through my mind as a result of my outburst.

_A gold ring sliding onto my right hand. The wailing in the halls upon the news of Oropher’s death arrived. Thranduil, weak and weeping in my arms, as he mourned his father._

I felt my breathing speed up and my legs grow weak. My suddenly frail fingers tugged at his robes as I tried to speak. I could feel what was coming.

“Meleth-” my voice came in a whisper. My eyes were still pressed closed but I felt him shift to look at me, his arms winding around to support me.

_Shouting and crying out for help. The clang of swords and armor. The deep bone shaking sound of weapons and bodies falling to the earth. Dragon fire billowing down to me, engulfing me in a wave of pain._

With a brief, solitary whimper, I lost myself to it and collapsed in his arms.

 

_Thranduil and I smiled at each other for a few moments, our hands entwined, before we took our first steps into the great hall. A feast had been prepared for the celebration of our marriage. A great crowd gathered together for the food and music that would be shared following our vows. We walked together to the platform where his father waited with a gentle smile on his face. As my parents had not followed Oropher to the West, I was without my mother to bless my marriage but I had grown close with another high ranking woman of Oropher’s court who kindly offered to take my mother’s place in the ceremony, Adlenniel._

_As was customary, Oropher stepped forward to place a necklace around my neck. My dear friend Adlenniel presented Thranduil with a necklace as well. The pendant had silver branches reaching from behind an amber gemstone. The necklace presented to me was of a similar make, though more delicate in its craftsmanship._

_I looked to Thranduil as Oropher spoke._

_“Tiro Thranduil ah Elithien Aran Einior, ah elio din Eru,” his voice carried through the echoing hall as all his guests grew quiet. May Manwe Lord of Wind watch over Thranduil and Elithien, and may Eru the Father of All bless them._

_“Lasto iâl Elithien ah Thranduil, ah elio din Eru,” Adlenniel gave the blessing my mother would have given. May Varda Star-kindler hear Elithien and Thranduil’s calls, and may Eru the Father of All bless them._

_Our hands separated for the first time since we entered the hall in order to remove the silver rings we exchanged at our betrothal and return them to one another. And finally, I placed the thin gold band onto his hand and he slid his own onto mine. A great cheer went round the room as the feast officially began and music echoed through the halls. We sat together with him on the right hand of his father._

_Thranduil was frustrated with how large the celebration was, knowing a larger crowd meant a longer feast before our actual marriage began. The exchanging of rings and the great feast were parts of the wedding but they were not the most important pieces. The most important piece was yet to come. We ate and drank and danced and spoke with those we knew we were expected to speak with but Thranduil could not endure the entire party and I knew I could not either. We snuck away, out into the evening air. I wanted nothing more than to be by his side, it didn’t matter what we did. We could walk for days without stopping and I would still carry on if I had his hand in mine._

_Walking together, we reached the chambers that had been prepared for us, for our wedding night. Giving no thought to the feast or his father or Adlenniel, we locked the doors behind us._

 

_“My lady!” a messenger hurried into the dining room as I was finishing my morning meal. Surprised at his urgency, I stood upon his entrance. “My lady, news from Dagorlad.”_

_“Is it my husband?” I spoke without thinking, my eyes wide and my heart pounding with fear._

_“His father,” he paused, unsure of how to proceed. “The King is dead.” I fell back into my chair, causing it to screech backward a little and what servants were in the room to rush forward. Sitting very still for several minutes, I tried not to berate myself for feeling that small rush of relief when I was told it was not Thranduil._

_“Where is my husband now?” I asked quietly._

_“He is tending the body of his father for burial.”_

_“He will be buried on the Plains of Dagorlad?”_

_“Yes. They suffered many casualties. He will be buried among the other dead.” I leaned back in the chair, clenching my eyes shut in an attempt to stop the tears that threatened to come._

_“I wish to see my son,” I announced as I stood. Passing through the halls quickly, I reached the library. The tutor who had been instructing him in history seemed surprised at my entrance and increasingly concerned at the troubled expression on my face. Legolas ran to me and hugged my skirts before I bent down so that I was at his height. He was less than seven years old at that time and so eager to follow his father and grandfather everywhere. Pushing Legolas’ hair back from his face, I gave him a smile._

_“What is it, Ammë?” he asked, happy to see me interrupt his lesson._

_“Would you like to cut your lesson short for the day and go for a walk with me?”_

_“Can I?” he beamed at me with that radiant smile._

_“Of course, iôn nin.” I hugged him and I was thankful he didn’t try to fight me that time. It was comforting to hold him so close; his presence calmed my racing heart. I kissed his forehead before I stood and looked to the messenger and my lady’s maids that had followed me. “You may spread the news.”_

_“Bereth nin,” the messenger knelt. My queen._

_I held Legolas’ hand in my own as the others in the room followed his lead, kneeling and bowing before their new queen._

_“Ammë, what’s going on?”_

 

_A week later Thranduil and a small contingent of elves arrived at the gates. His armor was damaged and required a deep cleaning. He himself looked the same as when he left, all serious except now he appeared to be without an ounce of happiness left to him. He was greeted as a king should be. I was there at the gates as soon as they announced his arrival._

_I stood tall and stern, mirroring the strength I knew I would see in him. We joined hands when he dismounted and met me. I put one hand on his cheek and pushed his hair behind his ear. We did not speak then merely stared at one another for several moments before I led him inside._

 

_I helped a single servant, Galion, remove my husband’s armor. Weary from the hurried journey home, I helped him bathe and dress. His face remained in its stone like posture that he had put on until I dismissed Galion and began brushing his hair. His hair nearly dry, I let the brush lay on the table beside us as I ran my fingers through his platinum locks. It was shortly after this began that I heard him emit a gentle sob, as if he were trying to hide it from me._

_“Meleth,” I spoke softly in the nearly silent room, my hands retreating from his hair. Seeking to comfort him, I stepped to stand in front of him and guided him to lean against me. His arms wrapped around my waist and he pressed his face against my abdomen, while my hands returned to stroking his hair. He wept, shaking beneath my hands and holding onto me as if I might disappear at any moment. I could feel the loss that he felt, the immense pain. There was nothing I could say or do that could help him, I could only be with him and offer myself as comfort. Watching Thranduil suffer that loss led me to think in those moments how I never wished for Legolas to know the loss of his father._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meleth nin: My love  
> Meleth: Love  
> Bereth nin: My queen  
> Iôn nin: My son  
> Ammë: Mommy


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After recovering more memories of her marriage to Thranduil, Bellethiel agrees to marry him again. Tension has arisen between Legolas and Bellethiel since his father's revelation but Bellethiel, or perhaps Elithien, wants to bridge the gap between them. Bellethiel realizes how much like Elithien she has become.

_ I watched Thranduil silently from across the room as Galion helped him dress to leave again, back to the battlefield in the South. I was terrified but in the various times in my life that I had felt so, I had learned to hide it when necessary. I hid it from Galion and I hid it from our son but I could not hide it from my husband. Galion left and I carried my husband’s cloak to him. Remaining silent, I draped it over his shoulders, securing it at his neck with his brooch. He gave me a weak smile and kissed my head with both his hands on my shoulders. His cheek lingered on my forehead.  _

_ “I know what you face in Mordor. It need not take your life as well. You have your people and your son,” I reminded him softly.  _

_ “I have you and our little leafling,” he confirmed.  _

_ “We need you here.” It wasn’t a reminder, it was almost a plea, asking him to stay. _

_ “I must lead what is left of our people.”  _

_ “I know, but…”  _

_ “What’s wrong?” he pulled away to look at me. _

_ “I can feel something coming, something dangerous. We can’t lose you.” He didn’t disregard my warning or believe it to be nonsense. He took it very seriously but his duty outweighed any warning I could give.  _

_ “Meleth nin, our destinies are not written in stone,” he paused and held me close again, my head against his shoulder. “I will return home when the war is done.” He took a step back and smiled gently at me again. “Come with me to say farewell to Legolas.”  _

 

_ I know now, that I should not have left but when I made the decision to follow him, I only feared for his life. I was as good a warrior as he, perhaps even better when we were in our youth. I sensed a great danger coming and I could not allow him to face it without me.  _

 

I woke slowly, shifting beneath the sheets that were laid overtop me. Rolling onto my side, I saw Thranduil looking at me, a book in his hand and a nearly empty wine glass on the bedside table. We were still in his chambers, though I couldn’t tell the time. My fear from the past lingered in my mind. I needed him close to me. I stretched out my arm, reaching to him. Kneeling beside the bed, he took my hand in both of his and watched my face. 

“Memories?” he whispered.

“Yes.” 

“What were they?” 

“Oropher’s death. You leaving for Barad-dûr,” I tried to smile. “Our wedding day.” Tears tried to well up in my eyes as the memories fluttered through my mind. I could still feel every bit of joy and pain from all those years ago. 

“It is in the past, meleth,” he tried to comfort me. 

“It is my past.” I stared up at him. “I am your wife. I have been for a long time.” Pulling my hand from his, I pushed some of his hair back and slid my hand onto his cheek. “I will continue to be…” 

“Then will you marry me again?” 

“You must allow me to act independently,” I told him. 

“As long as you do not act recklessly,” he said, “I cannot bear to lose you again.” 

“I know.” I stroked his cheek with my thumb and gave him a weak smile.  After a few moments, he leaned down and kissed me, soft and chaste and comforting. Once he broke away from my lips, he sat up again, warily eyeing my expression. “Should we tell anyone?” 

“Legolas should know,” he answered, the relief at my acceptance nearly invisible in his face. 

“When?” I offered him my hand again and he placed his own hands around it. 

“In the morning.”

“When will we be married again?” 

“When you wish to be,” he paused, “Though I hope that you would wish it soon.” 

“Your wish is mine, meleth.”  We were silent for several moments. 

“Will a week be sufficient for any preparations?” he asked. 

“That’s a week longer than I thought you would offer,” I grinned. He smiled back, looking to my eyes first then my hand in his.

“Is it enough for you?” 

“Yes.”  After the remembrances of our wedding and our son and the loss of his father, I felt an unparalleled longing to remain as close to him as I could until I no longer could. If I could stay by his side, I might remain happy until the end of my days. 

 

In the following week, I spent much of my time alone and despite what I knew Thranduil would say, I went outside. In the simplest, warmest dress that I had available to me, I went just outside of the gates to sit beneath the trees. Nothing would dare get this close to the gates of the Woodland realm, so I dared to climb a nearby tree and sit on a branch several feet above the ground. It was nearly nightfall when I climbed down, after spending a while watching the guard periodically sweep the forest as well as elven traders come and go. Time to dress for dinner was approaching so I began my descent. 

As I let myself fall a few feet to the forest floor, Legolas was returning from the forest with the guard. When he saw me he separated from the group and approached me. 

“My father would not like it if you were out at this time of day,” he told me. 

“I know. I think might be part of why I’m here,” I gave him a smile. We were quiet for several moments. “I suppose your father told you.” 

“Yes,” he replied curtly, looking away from my face. 

“Do you believe him?” I responded in kind. He looked back to me.

“I have no way of knowing what he says is true.” 

“I know,” I said, “I will not ask you to believe but I will ask you to trust him.” We stared at each other for several more seconds, neither of us moving. “I wish you did not have to grow up without a mother, Legolas. It pains me to think of it.” The memory of him hugging my skirts replayed in my mind, over and over as he stared at me with those blue eyes. “I’m so sorry.” 

“My mother has been lost for millennia. I have almost no memory of her.” 

“If I could change the past, I would have never left you.” I didn’t intend to become so emotional so quickly but it happened as the memories of his first years flitted through my mind alongside all the moments that I missed. He clenched his jaw and he looked away. 

“You will be late for dinner if you linger much longer here.” I nodded.

“Good evening, Legolas,” I said before walking on towards the gates. 

  
  


Thranduil always provided the best he possibly could for me. The finest dresses and jewels were always in supply when Thranduil saw me at all lacking in them. In my eyes, I never lacked them but in his eyes, he could never give me enough. During the week before we were to be remarried, he sent me increasingly extravagant gifts. I knew Maerwen would grow suspicious and a limited number of servants should be told if we were to resume our roles as a husband and wife. Galion and Maerwen would be enough. 

It was difficult for the two of us to tell them so that they would understand our situation and in the end, they were loyal to us. Galion was able to see my past in my face from the beginning, though he kept himself quiet. Maerwen was enamored by the concept of our story, tragic lovers brought back together seemingly by the power of our love. These two and Legolas would witness our exchange of rings and the restoration of the gifts given by his father and my dear friend at our wedding. 

 

Late that afternoon, Maerwen helped me dress in a gown that I had been given for the occasion. It was a deep, dark blue with silver woven through the fabric to resemble stars. The fabric was heavy and warm, no doubt at the request of Thranduil in order to keep his now mortal wife warm in the cold, Northern winter.  Maerwen arranged my hair so that it appeared to be held in one loose braid while vines of silver flowers adorned my crown. At the sight of myself in the mirror, I thought at once that I finally home, where I was meant to be, as well as a stranger. Bellethiel was nearly gone in all but her body and name. I was no longer the young girl that Elrond found in the woods that fateful morning. I was the wife of a king of elves, a powerful and wealthy immortal being whom I had no hope of outliving. I was his immortal wife but also destined to die a mortal death in a blink of his eye. As compelling as they facts were, I wanted him. I wanted him by my side. I wanted to feel like I never left him. 

I wanted to feel all those centuries to disappear between us. 

I walked with my head held as proudly as I had walked in those last years of my life to his door. Maerwen followed close behind me. Galion opened the door for me and as Maerwen and I entered the King’s chambers, our company was complete. 

“Elithien,” Thranduil spoke my name gently as I joined him, the two of us joining hands. In that moment that he said my name, calling me by my name for the first time in centuries, I felt like nothing else existed, only him speaking my name. “Shall we?” He led me to the center of the room, near where Legolas and Galion stood. 

Legolas approached me with the necklace that Oropher had placed around my neck. The chain had been replaced with a more ornate setting of silver branches reaching down to the teardrop amber stone. He placed it around my neck silently, briefly making eye contact before retreating to where he stood before. Thranduil’s necklace had long been made into a brooch which he often wore, and that night adorned where his collar met at the front of his throat. 

The remains of my marriage ring were lost in the battle but it had been reforged at Thranduil’s order. He wasn’t wearing his when I arrived so that I might replace it on his hand. Maerwen handed me his ring and I placed it on his hand as I had millennia ago. Galion handed his king the ring prepared for me and Thranduil slid it onto my hand, eyes never leaving the growing smile on my face. I didn’t care to know what was said from Galion or Maerwen before they left us. 

I knew Galion voiced his own pleasure at seeing the King in joyful mood again. Maerwen wished that the king and queen’s joy might last for many, many years to come. Legolas shared a simple message that he was pleased that his father found a source of light in his life. With these sentiments, they all left, silently and almost imperceptibly dismissed by their king who could hardly look away from his wife. 

“You ran them off, staring at me like that,” I pretended to scold him once the door shut behind Galion. 

“I think it may have been the both of us,” he smiled at me. I glanced down at our hands still clasped together. 

“They had dinner prepared for us,” I said, touching the gold ring on his hand. 

“Did you want to eat dinner before?” he watched my face. He brushed a lock of my hair over my shoulder and my eyes snapped up at him. 

“No.” He gave me a grin and I returned it. Shrugging his loose outer robes off his shoulders, he let them fall to the floor and put his hands on my face as he kissed me, hard and deep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update [7 December 2017]: I will be doing my best to update this story very soon. Very sorry that I sort of left this story again these past few months. I'm coming back to it soon. I really want to see this to the end. -- Lana

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to correct me on any incorrect use of Sindarin.


End file.
